On Fri, 31 Mar 2006 23:00:06 -0600, Mike O. wrote:

We were finishing up a house today and the last item we had to build
was a simple rough cedar fireplace surround. We had only five pieces.
Two 4"x8" pillars, two 6"deep x16"x 6" wide corbels and a 6"x12"
mantle. On the fireplace wall are two tall windows on either side of
the fireplace equal distance from the outside walls with the firebox
between.
The problem is that the fireplace itself is out of center by about 3".
The excuse the builder gave was that the flue from the basement
fireplace runs up the same chase (which I guess is not big enough) and
the fireplace had to be moved one direction to allow clearances for
the flue. Since the builder wasn't going to tear the back of the
house off at this point, we had a problem.
So, what do we do to make a surround look centered on the wall when
the fire box isn't? My suggestion was screw it, if it's out of center
it's out of center. You can't make chicken salad out of chicken ****
so center it on the box and go. My partner suggested we cheat a
little here and there, move one pillar out of center a little (since
river rock between the pillars would help hide it) and cheat a little
on the mantle. The builder suggested that he would call the owners
and let them decide.
A while later the owner comes out. We explain the problem (they seem
to understand and are aware of the flue problem) and we draw on the
wall where the pieces could go. Then we put the pillars against the
wall and move them around a few times. Then we hold the 150 lb mantle
over our heads and move it around a few times. Then we move the
pillars a few more times and for good measure we move the mantle even
more times. 90 minutes of this (I'm not exaggerating) and we finally
have a decision. IMO the wrong decision but we have one. The owner
has decided to center the pillars on the firebox and center the mantle
between the windows. This means the mantle hangs over one pillar 3"
more than it hangs over the other.
After the owner leaves, my partner and I don't say a word (more self
control today than usual) and as the builder leaves with his hands
thrown in the air he mutters "Just bill me."

Chances are I won't have to see that fireplace again...that is until
they call me to try to figure out how to take 3" off of that 6x12 now
that it's hanging on the wall. :-)

Thank God for Friday and a couple days off!

Sorry for the rant!

Mike O.



Well, it will probably be OK in the end. I am currrently working on
Finish in a late 19th century farmhouse that was gutted and reframed
from the inside. The framers were hacks and so I have encountered many
issues like the one you describe. I was at the site while they were
still working because I came to frame the stairs. (I refuse to finish
stairs unless I've framed them). I was appalled by the way these
clowns worked - probably boring for me to list out all the details but
suffice to say things are very difficult to finish clean and crisp
when out of plumb, off-center, out of square, etc.
But, the interesting part - - - nobody really notices (except pro's).
I'll spend hours trying to take the curse off of some clusterf*ck and
then worry that it is still not correct and when I point it out to the
owner he says "hey, Joe, it looks great". He is more apt to ask why
the knotty pine has different sized knots.
So, my guess is that you will see that 3" every time you walk in the
room but others might not even notice.

Good Luck,
J