I want to worship our great president by creating a larger-than-life
wooden statue of him.

What do I need ???

"Dan Simper" wrote in message
om...
I want to worship our great president by creating a larger-than-life
wooden statue of him.

What do I need ???

Trolling lessons.

B.

What do I need ???


Get a shovel and find yourself a tree stump. As in dumb as a stump.
Mike in Arkansas

You are? and you admit that to the world?

"Mike in Arkansas" wrote in message
...
What do I need ???

As in dumb as a stump.
Mike in Arkansas

lots and lots of fake wood!!
"Dan Simper" wrote in message
om...
I want to worship our great president by creating a larger-than-life
wooden statue of him.

What do I need ???

Dan Simper wrote:
I want to worship our great president by creating a larger-than-life
wooden statue of him.

What do I need ???

A lot wood.

In article , Dan
Simper wrote:

I want to worship our great president by creating a larger-than-life
wooden statue of him.

What do I need ???

A testicle would help.

--
"The thing about saying the wrong words is that A, I don't notice it, and B,
sometimes orange water gibbon bucket and plastic." -- Mr. Burrows

(Dan Simper) wrote in
om:

I want to worship our great president by creating a larger-than-life
wooden statue of him.

What do I need ???

Send your $200 payment to the DNC for a set of scale drawings and complete
instructions.

Dan Simper wrote:

I want to worship our great president by creating a larger-than-life
wooden statue of him.

What do I need ???

A big lathe and a big log.

--
Michael McIntyre ---- Silvan
Linux fanatic, and certified Geek; registered Linux user #243621
http://www.geocities.com/Paris/Rue/5407/
http://rosegarden.sourceforge.net/tutorial/

Dan Simper apparently said,on my timestamp of 23/01/2005 4:17 PM:

I want to worship our great president by creating a larger-than-life
wooden statue of him.

What do I need ???

A large, wide and heavy log.
Drop it on your head.


--
Cheers
Nuno Souto
in sunny Sydney, Australia
am

On Sun, 23 Jan 2005 22:51:41 +1100, Noons
wrote:

Dan Simper apparently said,on my timestamp of 23/01/2005 4:17 PM:

I want to worship our great president by creating a larger-than-life
wooden statue of him.

What do I need ???

A large, wide and heavy log.
Drop it on your head.

Noons, did you get the email I sent to you?

Greg

Groggy wrote:

Noons, did you get the email I sent to you?

I did. You used your no-spam addie
to send it, so my reply bounced back.

On 23 Jan 2005 22:16:04 -0800, "Noons" wrote:

Groggy wrote:

Noons, did you get the email I sent to you?

I did. You used your no-spam addie
to send it, so my reply bounced back.

greg(at)millen(dot)com

"Dan Simper" wrote in message
om...
I want to worship our great president by creating a larger-than-life
wooden statue of him.

What do I need ???

Dear Troll,

Thank you for your troll. Your troll has been evaluated by
our panel of experts. Here are the results of our tests.

We found that your troll was...
[ ] Incomprehensible
[ ] Offensive
[x] Just plain stupid
[x] Without merit
[ ] Grammatically incorrect
[ ] Laced with spelling and punctuation errors
[ ] Laden with circular reasoning
[ ] Laced with misunderstandings of basic woodworking principles
[ ] Somewhat too revealing of your minimal mental abilities
[ ] Too similar to other trolls submitted in the past

You could improve your troll considerably by...
[ ] Including a few actual facts
[ ] Taking remedial English lessons
[ ] Mentioning that you are a professional
[ ] Stating more falsehoods as facts than you already have
[ ] Swearing more
[ ] Including more colorful personal insults
[ ] Using the phrases "you people" or "those people" more
[ ] Modifying your insults to cover larger groups of people at once
[ ] Ranting incoherently
[ ] Using religious or racial slurs
[ ] Using the words "junk", "crap", "garbage", "toy", "flimsy" and
"Professional" more frequently
[ ] Using childish taunts
[x] Including fake laughter such as "ha ha ha" or "har de har de har"
[ ] Focusing on just one outrageous topic will give your troll more punch
[ ] Ignoring any facts, and using more absolutes in your troll
[ ] Using all capital letters
[x Focusing more on those areas in which "your" view is better than "their"
view
[ ] Exaggerate more, you need not be limited by facts

Please get a...
[x] life
[ ] grip
[ ] job
[ ] clue
[ ] book on basic woodworking
[ ] note from your mom
[ ] SawStop


You should...
[ ] Have someone who can read review your postings
[ ] Save your postings for later and think if you really want to send them
[ ] Take your medication
[ ] Not have "one for the road" next time
[ ] Stay in school
[ ] Go and buy whatever blurffl you want, we don't care
[ ] Think about other people's feelings before you post
[x] Get your ego boost some other way
[ ] Realize that by trolling a group you hurt everyone, not just the people
you are mad at
[ ] Go away so we can talk about woodworking

[ ] Put up a web site with your name on it to show the world
[ ] Take down your web site, it's not very good


Suggested other activities besides trolling...
[x] Posting something constructive
[ ] Actually cutting wood
[ ] Helping someone else
[ ] Spending some time with your family instead of your magazines
[ ] Working off that big pot belly
[ ] Get your ego boost instead by helping out at a local hospital
[x] Consider another hobby that does not require contact with other humans
e.g. mortuary science

Thank you for your submission.

You have...
[ ] passed
[ ] passed with honors
[x] failed, must try harder

In article ,
says...
I want to worship our great president by creating a larger-than-life
wooden statue of him.

I see dingbat has gone off his meds again. Posting nonsense to several
groups.

Be sure to remove the "is.matur" newsgroup from the reply list in case
he's in another trolling contest.

--
Homo sapiens is a goal, not a description

On Sun, 23 Jan 2005 10:49:23 -0800, Larry Blanchard
wrote:

In article ,
says...
I want to worship our great president by creating a larger-than-life
wooden statue of him.

I see dingbat has gone off his meds again. Posting nonsense to several
groups.

Be sure to remove the "is.matur" newsgroup from the reply list in case
he's in another trolling contest.

Just out of curiosity Larry, what is is.matur?




+--------------------------------------------------------------------------------+

If you're gonna be dumb, you better be tough

+--------------------------------------------------------------------------------+

In article ,
says...
Be sure to remove the "is.matur" newsgroup from the reply list in case
he's in another trolling contest.

Just out of curiosity Larry, what is is.matur?

I have no idea, but obviously a newsgroup. Appears to be one from
Iceland. Good home for a troll :-).

--
Homo sapiens is a goal, not a description

I want to worship our great president by creating a larger-than-life
wooden statue of him.

What do I need ???

Spalted Maple.