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Woodworking (rec.woodworking) Discussion forum covering all aspects of working with wood. All levels of expertise are encouraged to particiapte. |
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#1
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wife offered membership; why not me
Today, my wife received the big orange envelope in the mail. Her
personalized invitation to join the Handyman Club of America as a charter member. How many years now have they been recruiting charter members? I don't know how in the hell they got her name. Even got the "Mrs." right in the salutation. I snagged her free gift - the glue spreader, aka a drill bit guide. That makes four I have now. My kids drew some pictures, my wife grabbed some expired coupons and we stuffed the postage paid envelope full of our "junk mail" and sent it back to them. Bob |
#2
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wife offered membership; why not me
On Fri, 18 Jul 2003 21:47:59 -0500, "bob"
wrote: I snagged her free gift - the glue spreader, aka a drill bit guide. That makes four I have now. My kids drew some pictures, my wife grabbed some expired coupons and we stuffed the postage paid envelope full of our "junk mail" and sent it back to them. Since it _was_ postage paid, you could have taped the empty envelope to a cinder block. Michael Baglio Chapel Hill |
#3
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wife offered membership; why not me
LMAO ! I'll have to try that with the next one.
Bob "Michael Baglio" wrote in message ... On Fri, 18 Jul 2003 21:47:59 -0500, "bob" wrote: I snagged her free gift - the glue spreader, aka a drill bit guide. That makes four I have now. My kids drew some pictures, my wife grabbed some expired coupons and we stuffed the postage paid envelope full of our "junk mail" and sent it back to them. Since it _was_ postage paid, you could have taped the empty envelope to a cinder block. Michael Baglio Chapel Hill |
#4
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wife offered membership; why not me
My daughter, now 12, received her invitation to join about a year or so
back. I have no clue where they picked up her name, either. Glen "bob" wrote in message ... Today, my wife received the big orange envelope in the mail. Her personalized invitation to join the Handyman Club of America as a charter member. How many years now have they been recruiting charter members? I don't know how in the hell they got her name. Even got the "Mrs." right in the salutation. I snagged her free gift - the glue spreader, aka a drill bit guide. That makes four I have now. My kids drew some pictures, my wife grabbed some expired coupons and we stuffed the postage paid envelope full of our "junk mail" and sent it back to them. Bob |
#5
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wife offered membership; why not me
"jo4hn" wrote in message rthlink.net... I write "DISEASED" on the face of the return envelope and send it back empty. If the mail handler can't read very well, I am removed from the list. If he can read, the envelope is burned. :-) I am having a good day. ROTFL! ;-) Which "disease" are your "diseased" with? Warts? Wasp stings? Or, perhaps, you write "deceased" on the envelope? Jim Stuyck |
#6
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wife offered membership; why not me
bob wrote:
member. How many years now have they been recruiting charter members? I don't know how in the hell they got her name. Even got the "Mrs." right in the salutation. Yeah, I know how that goes. I've been a Popular Mechanics subscriber for years and years. Mrs. Renee O. McIntyre *sigh* -- Michael McIntyre ---- Silvan Linux fanatic, and certified Geek; registered Linux user #243621 Confirmed post number: 16554 Approximate word count: 496620 http://www.geocities.com/Paris/Rue/5407/ |
#7
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wife offered membership; why not me
On Sat, 19 Jul 2003 16:07:43 GMT, "Jim Stuyck" wrote:
"jo4hn" wrote in message arthlink.net... I write "DISEASED" on the face of the return envelope and send it back empty. If the mail handler can't read very well, I am removed from the list. If he can read, the envelope is burned. :-) I am having a good day. ROTFL! ;-) Which "disease" are your "diseased" with? Warts? Wasp stings? Or, perhaps, you write "deceased" on the envelope? Jim Stuyck I think that was jo4hn's point -- removal vs. burned. |
#8
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wife offered membership; why not me
Jim Stuyck wrote: "jo4hn" wrote in message rthlink.net... I write "DISEASED" on the face of the return envelope and send it back empty. If the mail handler can't read very well, I am removed from the list. If he can read, the envelope is burned. :-) I am having a good day. ROTFL! ;-) Which "disease" are your "diseased" with? Warts? Wasp stings? Or, perhaps, you write "deceased" on the envelope? Jim Stuyck One of my purposes in life is to bring a bit of the surreal to others lives. Hence "diseased". j4 |
#9
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wife offered membership; why not me
"jo4hn" wrote in message rthlink.net... Jim Stuyck wrote: "jo4hn" wrote in message rthlink.net... I write "DISEASED" on the face of the return envelope and send it back empty. If the mail handler can't read very well, I am removed from the list. If he can read, the envelope is burned. :-) I am having a good day. ROTFL! ;-) Which "disease" are your "diseased" with? Warts? Wasp stings? Or, perhaps, you write "deceased" on the envelope? Jim Stuyck One of my purposes in life is to bring a bit of the surreal to others lives. Hence "diseased". At least "that's your story and you're sticking to it." ;-) Jim |
#10
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wife offered membership; why not me
jo4hn wrote: I write "DISEASED" on the face of the return envelope and send it back empty. If the mail handler can't read very well, I am removed from the list. If he can read, the envelope is burned. :-) I am having a good day. mahalo, jo4hn You, sir, are weird! I LIKE that in a person! ARM ;-) |
#11
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wife offered membership; why not me
On Sat, 19 Jul 2003 21:29:39 GMT, jo4hn
pixelated: One of my purposes in life is to bring a bit of the surreal to others lives. Hence "diseased". j4 Try "Sieze and Desistered" some time, too. ------------------------------------------------------- "i" before "e", except after "c", what a weird society. ---- http://diversify.com Dynamic Website Applications |
#13
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wife offered membership; why not me
In article ,
Jack-of-all-trades - JOAT wrote: Sat, Jul 19, 2003, 3:13pm (EDT+4) (jo4hn) says: I write "DISEASED" on the face of the return envelope and send it back empty. If the mail handler can't read very well, I am removed from the list. If he can read, the envelope is burned. :-) I am having a good day. I prefer to be truthful, and simply write something like "refused as obscene material". If you want to _be_sure_ that they don't mail you again, just trot down to the Post Office, and ask for a "Form 1500". Fill it out, which involves claiming that *YOU* (and *nobody* -- not the Post Office, or even the U.S. Supreme Court can override your evaluation) find the material to be obscene, and don't want any more mailing from that company. Not only do they have to stop sending you 'stuff', they have to remove your name/address/etc. from _all_ their records. This means that they can't rent/sell your name/address to somebody else who wants to junk mail you. Related info: For those getting the subscription 'renewal' notices from the people -not- related to the magazine; sending 'fake' invoices is *illegal*. The Federal law is "39 USC 3001 (d)". The post office takes a _very_ dim view of such activities. Go to the Post Office, again, and ask for "Form 8165". You'll need to include a copy of the 'invoice' *and* a copy of the face of the envelope, with the complaint when you submit it. |
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