Just emailed the MD of a company a photo of me knobbing the gf instead
of a photo of the fault on the lights in his office that I just fixed.

--
Adam

On 16/06/2018 13:30, ARW wrote:

Just emailed the MD of a company a photo of me knobbing the gf instead
of a photo of the fault on the lights in his office that I just fixed.

Maybe he'll give you a discount if you send more.

--
Max Demian

On 16/06/2018 13:30, ARW wrote:

Just emailed the MD of a company a photo of me knobbing the gf instead
of a photo of the fault on the lights in his office that I just fixed.


ITYM "I've just discovered my PC has been hacked so I need to email all
my contacts and tell them to disregard recent mail from me"



--
Robin
reply-to address is (intended to be) valid

On 16/06/2018 13:30, ARW wrote:

Just emailed the MD of a company a photo of me knobbing the gf instead
of a photo of the fault on the lights in his office that I just fixed.

Well it could be worse... a photo of you knobbing his gf/wife for
example ;-)


--
Cheers,

John.

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\================================================= ================/

ARW Wrote in message:

Just emailed the MD of a company a photo of me knobbing the gf instead
of a photo of the fault on the lights in his office that I just fixed.

--
Adam


Hahaha :-D priceless!

Maybe they're swingers? Or LGBTW?

--
Jim K


----Android NewsGroup Reader----
http://usenet.sinaapp.com/

On Saturday, 16 June 2018 13:30:17 UTC+1, ARW wrote:
Just emailed the MD of a company a photo of me knobbing the gf instead
of a photo of the fault on the lights in his office that I just fixed.

That's even funnier than the bloke on the plumbing forum who drilled through the shower pipe he fitted yesterday.

Owain

On Sat, 16 Jun 2018 13:30:14 +0100, ARW wrote:

Just emailed the MD of a company a photo of me knobbing the gf instead
of a photo of the fault on the lights in his office that I just fixed.

Ah, the delights and dangers of modern digital photography, all neatly
illustrated in a single sentence. :-)

--
Johnny B Good

On 16/06/18 14:57, Martin wrote:
On Sat, 16 Jun 2018 14:05:08 +0100, John Rumm
wrote:

On 16/06/2018 13:30, ARW wrote:

Just emailed the MD of a company a photo of me knobbing the gf instead
of a photo of the fault on the lights in his office that I just fixed.

Well it could be worse... a photo of you knobbing his gf/wife for
example ;-)

and daughters.

Or sons...


--
Truth welcomes investigation because truth knows investigation will lead
to converts. It is deception that uses all the other techniques.

Johnny B Good Wrote in message:
On Sat, 16 Jun 2018 13:30:14 +0100, ARW wrote:

Just emailed the MD of a company a photo of me knobbing the gf instead
of a photo of the fault on the lights in his office that I just fixed.

Ah, the delights and dangers of modern digital photography, all neatly
illustrated in a single sentence. :-)


And unusually for you responded to in a single sentence! The
therapy must be working ;-)
or you're busting for a crap
:-)


--
Jim K

Well there you go then...
Brian

--
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This newsgroup posting comes to you directly from...
The Sofa of Brian Gaff...

Blind user, so no pictures please!
"ARW" wrote in message
...

Just emailed the MD of a company a photo of me knobbing the gf instead of
a photo of the fault on the lights in his office that I just fixed.

--
Adam

On Saturday, 16 June 2018 13:30:17 UTC+1, ARW wrote:
Just emailed the MD of a company a photo of me knobbing the gf instead
of a photo of the fault on the lights in his office that I just fixed.

At least you didn't email-to-Usenet this time

Owain

On 16/06/2018 14:03, Jim K wrote:
ARW Wrote in message:

Just emailed the MD of a company a photo of me knobbing the gf instead
of a photo of the fault on the lights in his office that I just fixed.

--
Adam


Hahaha :-D priceless!

Maybe they're swingers? Or LGBTW?


They are religious, I know as I have worked a lot at their house.

And he thought it was funny.




--
Adam

On 16/06/2018 19:09, Jim K wrote:
Johnny B Good Wrote in message:
On Sat, 16 Jun 2018 13:30:14 +0100, ARW wrote:

Just emailed the MD of a company a photo of me knobbing the gf instead
of a photo of the fault on the lights in his office that I just fixed.

Ah, the delights and dangers of modern digital photography, all neatly
illustrated in a single sentence. :-)


And unusually for you responded to in a single sentence! The
therapy must be working ;-)
or you're busting for a crap
:-)


I would like to jump to the defence of the more thoughtful response, not
only does is demonstrate a little more effort on the part of the sender
(usually anyway), it can greatly add to the "colour" of the group.


--
Cheers,

John.

/================================================== ===============\
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\================================================= ================/

On 17/06/2018 14:16, Huge wrote:
On 2018-06-17, John Rumm wrote:
On 16/06/2018 19:09, Jim K wrote:
Johnny B Good Wrote in message:
On Sat, 16 Jun 2018 13:30:14 +0100, ARW wrote:

Just emailed the MD of a company a photo of me knobbing the gf instead
of a photo of the fault on the lights in his office that I just fixed.

Ah, the delights and dangers of modern digital photography, all neatly
illustrated in a single sentence. :-)


And unusually for you responded to in a single sentence! The
therapy must be working ;-)
or you're busting for a crap
:-)


I would like to jump to the defence of the more thoughtful response,

Hmmm.

"Je n'ai fait celle-ci plus longue que parce que je n'ai pas eu le
loisir de la faire plus courte."

-- Blaise Pascal.

(I would have written a shorter letter, but I did not have the time.)

Similar idea to one of the US 20th century presidents who had a
"formula" if he was asked to do a speech. I forget the numbers but in
essence, if it was a 10 minute speech he needed three months notice. For
a 1 hour speech, he needed a month. For a 3 hour speech, he could do it
next week.

---
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"newshound" wrote in message
o.uk...
Similar idea to one of the US 20th century presidents who had a "formula"
if he was asked to do a speech. I forget the numbers but in essence, if it
was a 10 minute speech he needed three months notice. For a 1 hour speech,
he needed a month. For a 3 hour speech, he could do it next week.

Working out what to leave out, with successive excising of more and more of
the details that you regard as essential, is a major task.

On Sat, 16 Jun 2018 13:30:14 +0100, ARW wrote:

Just emailed the MD of a company a photo of me knobbing the gf instead
of a photo of the fault on the lights in his office that I just fixed.

I'd be more sympathetic if you hadn't regaled us over the years with all
those colourful reports of your extraordinary number of sexual conquests
carried out whilst you were supposed to be on the job!!




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This message may be freely reproduced without limit or charge only via
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protocols, whether for profit or not, is conditional upon a charge of
GBP10.00 per reproduction. Publication in this manner via non-Usenet
protocols constitutes acceptance of this condition.

On Sunday, 17 June 2018 18:25:07 UTC+1, Cursitor Doom wrote:
I'd be more sympathetic if you hadn't regaled us over the years with all
those colourful reports of your extraordinary number of sexual conquests
carried out whilst you were supposed to be on the job!!

I thought most of them were expressions of gratitude after he'd finished the job, not while he was on it.

Owain

On 17/06/2018 18:25, Cursitor Doom wrote:
On Sat, 16 Jun 2018 13:30:14 +0100, ARW wrote:

Just emailed the MD of a company a photo of me knobbing the gf instead
of a photo of the fault on the lights in his office that I just fixed.

I'd be more sympathetic if you hadn't regaled us over the years with all
those colourful reports of your extraordinary number of sexual conquests
carried out whilst you were supposed to be on the job!!


Bumped into an ex at HMP New Hall last month. Last dated her back in
1986. She still looks good in a uniform.


--
Adam

"Cursitor Doom" wrote in message
news
On Sat, 16 Jun 2018 13:30:14 +0100, ARW wrote:

Just emailed the MD of a company a photo of me knobbing the gf instead
of a photo of the fault on the lights in his office that I just fixed.

I'd be more sympathetic if you hadn't regaled us over the years with
all those colourful reports of your extraordinary number of sexual
conquests carried out whilst you were supposed to be on the job!!

He is on the job, stupid.
https://www.urbandictionary.com/defi...on%20the%20job

On Sun, 17 Jun 2018 17:23:38 +0100, NY wrote:

"newshound" wrote in message
o.uk...
Similar idea to one of the US 20th century presidents who had a
"formula" if he was asked to do a speech. I forget the numbers but in
essence, if it was a 10 minute speech he needed three months notice.
For a 1 hour speech,
he needed a month. For a 3 hour speech, he could do it next week.

Working out what to leave out, with successive excising of more and more
of the details that you regard as essential, is a major task.

Or in my case, as some of you seem all too aware, trying to keep it
concise (in lieu of 'brevity'), without sacrificing *any* of the
'content'... and failing abysmally (in regard of the former rather than
the latter of my goals). :-(

--
Johnny B Good

On Sun, 17 Jun 2018 19:24:17 +0100, ARW wrote:

Bumped into an ex at HMP New Hall last month. Last dated her back in
1986. She still looks good in a uniform.

So.... you banged her again just for old time's sake, right?



--
This message may be freely reproduced without limit or charge only via
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protocols, whether for profit or not, is conditional upon a charge of
GBP10.00 per reproduction. Publication in this manner via non-Usenet
protocols constitutes acceptance of this condition.

On Sunday, 17 June 2018 19:24:19 UTC+1, ARW wrote:
Bumped into an ex at HMP New Hall last month. Last dated her back in
1986. She still looks good in a uniform.

blouse and epaulettes, or stripey shirt and denims?

Owain

On Sun, 17 Jun 2018 13:52:50 -0700, spuorgelgoog wrote:

On Sunday, 17 June 2018 19:24:19 UTC+1, ARW wrote:
Bumped into an ex at HMP New Hall last month. Last dated her back in
1986. She still looks good in a uniform.

blouse and epaulettes, or stripey shirt and denims?

She must have been on our side of the bars, or he'd never have been able
to give her a seeing to.




--
This message may be freely reproduced without limit or charge only via
the Usenet protocol. Reproduction in whole or part through other
protocols, whether for profit or not, is conditional upon a charge of
GBP10.00 per reproduction. Publication in this manner via non-Usenet
protocols constitutes acceptance of this condition.

On Mon, 18 Jun 2018 06:36:39 +1000, cantankerous geezer Rot Speed blabbered,
again:

I'd be more sympathetic if you hadn't regaled us over the years with
all those colourful reports of your extraordinary number of sexual
conquests carried out whilst you were supposed to be on the job!!

He is on the job, stupid.
https://www.urbandictionary.com/defi...on%20the%20job

Duh! And the incontinent senile Ozzietard also ****es in this thread! tsk

On Sun, 17 Jun 2018 17:23:38 +0100
"NY" wrote:

"newshound" wrote in message
o.uk...
Similar idea to one of the US 20th century presidents who had a
"formula" if he was asked to do a speech. I forget the numbers but
in essence, if it was a 10 minute speech he needed three months
notice. For a 1 hour speech, he needed a month. For a 3 hour
speech, he could do it next week.

Working out what to leave out, with successive excising of more and
more of the details that you regard as essential, is a major task.

I often find myself rewriting a post several times to make it clearer
and more concise, sometimes spending five or more minutes reducing it
to its essential meaning then deciding it's not worth posting and
discarding it. Although that may be more about me organising my
thoughts than communicating with others.

On 17/06/2018 22:37, Cursitor Doom wrote:
On Sun, 17 Jun 2018 13:52:50 -0700, spuorgelgoog wrote:

On Sunday, 17 June 2018 19:24:19 UTC+1, ARW wrote:
Bumped into an ex at HMP New Hall last month. Last dated her back in
1986. She still looks good in a uniform.

blouse and epaulettes, or stripey shirt and denims?

She must have been on our side of the bars, or he'd never have been able
to give her a seeing to.





I work on both sides of the bars.

She was my escort for the day, and yes that did make us smile.


For some reason I am not allowed to wander around a prison with a set of
keys!

--
Adam

"ARW" wrote in message ...

On 17/06/2018 22:37, Cursitor Doom wrote:
On Sun, 17 Jun 2018 13:52:50 -0700, spuorgelgoog wrote:

On Sunday, 17 June 2018 19:24:19 UTC+1, ARW wrote:
Bumped into an ex at HMP New Hall last month. Last dated her back in
1986. She still looks good in a uniform.

blouse and epaulettes, or stripey shirt and denims?

She must have been on our side of the bars, or he'd never have been able
to give her a seeing to.





I work on both sides of the bars.

She was my escort for the day, and yes that did make us smile.


For some reason I am not allowed to wander around a prison with a set of
keys!



You want to try working in Cat 'A' prisons like Albany and Long Lartin.
EVERYTHING needs fixing down, and that's just from the screws !

Been in most cat A prisons over the years

Andrew

On 18/06/2018 19:40, Andrew Mawson wrote:


You want to try working in Cat 'A' prisons like Albany and Long Lartin.
EVERYTHING needs fixing down, and that's just from the screws !

Been in most cat A prisons over the years

Could not get into HMP Wakefield. Someone spotted my ID was out of date.

HMP Sudbury (open) I was caught walking through a gate between the
prison and the car park. That's when they realised that the gate had
been left unlocked on the perimeter fence for the last two months (well
basically from when we started the work there).




--
Adam

On Monday, June 18, 2018 at 7:40:05 PM UTC+1, Andrew Mawson wrote:
"ARW" wrote in message ...

On 17/06/2018 22:37, Cursitor Doom wrote:
On Sun, 17 Jun 2018 13:52:50 -0700, spuorgelgoog wrote:

On Sunday, 17 June 2018 19:24:19 UTC+1, ARW wrote:
Bumped into an ex at HMP New Hall last month. Last dated her back in
1986. She still looks good in a uniform.

blouse and epaulettes, or stripey shirt and denims?

She must have been on our side of the bars, or he'd never have been able
to give her a seeing to.





I work on both sides of the bars.

She was my escort for the day, and yes that did make us smile.


For some reason I am not allowed to wander around a prison with a set of
keys!



You want to try working in Cat 'A' prisons like Albany and Long Lartin.
EVERYTHING needs fixing down, and that's just from the screws !

Been in most cat A prisons over the years

Andrew

OT: I came across a sort of "Revision guide for the Prison Officer's Exam"
recently, and took a few minutes to flick through it. I probably shouldn't have
been surprised, but I was gobsmacked at the [low] level it was pitched at.

"If there are 100 prisoners and 60% need to be moved to Cell Block A,
how many are left?". That was pretty representative.

J^n

"jkn" wrote in message
...
On Monday, June 18, 2018 at 7:40:05 PM UTC+1, Andrew Mawson wrote:
"ARW" wrote in message ...

On 17/06/2018 22:37, Cursitor Doom wrote:
On Sun, 17 Jun 2018 13:52:50 -0700, spuorgelgoog wrote:

On Sunday, 17 June 2018 19:24:19 UTC+1, ARW wrote:
Bumped into an ex at HMP New Hall last month. Last dated her back in
1986. She still looks good in a uniform.

blouse and epaulettes, or stripey shirt and denims?

She must have been on our side of the bars, or he'd never have been
able
to give her a seeing to.





I work on both sides of the bars.

She was my escort for the day, and yes that did make us smile.


For some reason I am not allowed to wander around a prison with a set of
keys!



You want to try working in Cat 'A' prisons like Albany and Long Lartin.
EVERYTHING needs fixing down, and that's just from the screws !

Been in most cat A prisons over the years

Andrew

OT: I came across a sort of "Revision guide for the Prison Officer's Exam"
recently, and took a few minutes to flick through it. I probably shouldn't
have
been surprised, but I was gobsmacked at the [low] level it was pitched at.

"If there are 100 prisoners and 60% need to be moved to Cell Block A,
how many are left?". That was pretty representative.

Why would anyone with anything viable between the ears want to be a prison
guard ?

On 19/06/2018 21:17, jkn wrote:
On Monday, June 18, 2018 at 7:40:05 PM UTC+1, Andrew Mawson wrote:
"ARW" wrote in message ...

On 17/06/2018 22:37, Cursitor Doom wrote:
On Sun, 17 Jun 2018 13:52:50 -0700, spuorgelgoog wrote:

On Sunday, 17 June 2018 19:24:19 UTC+1, ARW wrote:
Bumped into an ex at HMP New Hall last month. Last dated her back in
1986. She still looks good in a uniform.

blouse and epaulettes, or stripey shirt and denims?

She must have been on our side of the bars, or he'd never have been able
to give her a seeing to.





I work on both sides of the bars.

She was my escort for the day, and yes that did make us smile.


For some reason I am not allowed to wander around a prison with a set of
keys!



You want to try working in Cat 'A' prisons like Albany and Long Lartin.
EVERYTHING needs fixing down, and that's just from the screws !

Been in most cat A prisons over the years

Andrew

OT: I came across a sort of "Revision guide for the Prison Officer's Exam"
recently, and took a few minutes to flick through it. I probably shouldn't have
been surprised, but I was gobsmacked at the [low] level it was pitched at.

"If there are 100 prisoners and 60% need to be moved to Cell Block A,
how many are left?". That was pretty representative.

Prison officers are good at counting down.

Ask any one of them how many days they have left until they can take
early retirement or when their next compensation claim is due at court.

These have it down to the ms.


--
Adam

On Tuesday, 19 June 2018 21:30:30 UTC+1, Rod Speed wrote:
Why would anyone with anything viable between the ears want to be a prison
guard ?

Now that parking's been decriminalised and passed to local authorities, there aren't the openings for traffic wardens there once were.

Owain

ARW Wrote in message:
On 18/06/2018 19:40, Andrew Mawson wrote:


You want to try working in Cat 'A' prisons like Albany and Long Lartin.
EVERYTHING needs fixing down, and that's just from the screws !

Been in most cat A prisons over the years

Could not get into HMP Wakefield. Someone spotted my ID was out of date.

HMP Sudbury (open) I was caught walking through a gate between the
prison and the car park. That's when they realised that the gate had
been left unlocked on the perimeter fence for the last two months (well
basically from when we started the work there).

G4S?

--
--
Jim K


----Android NewsGroup Reader----
http://usenet.sinaapp.com/

On 19/06/2018 21:17, jkn wrote:

OT: I came across a sort of "Revision guide for the Prison Officer's Exam"
recently, and took a few minutes to flick through it. I probably shouldn't have
been surprised, but I was gobsmacked at the [low] level it was pitched at.

"If there are 100 prisoners and 60% need to be moved to Cell Block A,
how many are left?". That was pretty representative.



1 min 14 sec

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q5eejcfnx1c

or just do the test.

Makes my apprentices look good.


--
Adam

On Wed, 20 Jun 2018 06:30:18 +1000, cantankerous geezer Rot Speed blabbered,
again:

"If there are 100 prisoners and 60% need to be moved to Cell Block A,
how many are left?". That was pretty representative.

Why would anyone with anything viable between the ears want to be a prison
guard ?

....or become a pesky cantankerous senile troll on Usenet that keeps ****ing
in every thread, eh, Rot?

--
Sqwertz to Rot Speed:
"This is just a hunch, but I'm betting you're kinda an argumentative
asshole.
MID: