Come on, admit it- This is something you've always wanted to try .

**********

Pocket Taser Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife? This was submitted
by
a guy who purchased his lovely wife a "Pocket Taser" for their
anniversary.


Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that
sparked
my interest. The occasion was our 22nd anniversary and I was looking
for
a little something extra for my wife Toni.

What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized taser. The
effects of the taser were suppose to be short lived, with no long-term
adverse affect on your assailant, allowing her adequate time to
retreat to
safety.... WAY TOO COOL!

Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home. I loaded
two
triple-a batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button. Nothing! I
was
disappointed. I learned, however, that if I pushed the button AND
pressed it against a metal surface at the same time; I'd get the blue
arch of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs.
Awesome!!!

Unfortunately, I have yet to explain to Toni what that burn spot is on
the face of her microwave.

Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that
it
couldn't be all that bad with only two triple-a batteries,. right?!!!

There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently
(trusting
little soul) while I was reading the directions and thinking that I
really
needed to try this thing out on a flesh & blood moving target. I must
admit I thought about zapping Gracie (for a fraction of a second) and
thought better of it. She is such a sweet cat. But, if I was going to
give this thing to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did
want some assurance that it would work as advertised. Am I wrong?

So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my reading
glasses
perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand,
taser
in another. The directions said that a one-second burst would shock
and
disorient your assailant; a two-second burst was supposed to cause
muscle spasms and a major loss of bodily control; a three-second burst
would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish
out
of water. Any burst longer than three seconds would be wasting the
batteries.
All the while I'm looking at this little device measuring about 5"
long,
less than 3/4" in circumference; pretty cute really and loaded with
two itsy, bitsy triple-a batteries thinking to myself, "no possible
way!"

What happened next is almost beyond description, but I'll do my
best.....

I'm sitting there alone, Gracie looking on with her head ****ed to one
side as to say, "don't do it master," reasoning that a one-second
burst
from such a tiny little ole thing couldn't hurt all that bad.. I
decided
to give myself a one-second burst just for the heck of it. I touched
the
prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and HOLY MOTHER,
WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION@!@$$!%!@*!!!

I'm pretty sure Jessie Ventura ran in through the side door, picked me
up in the recliner, then body slammed us both on the carpet, over and
over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the
fetal
position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples on
fire,
testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm tucked under my body
in
the oddest position, and tingling in my legs. The cat was standing
over
me making meowing sounds I had never heard before, licking my face,
undoubtedly thinking to herself, "do it again, do it again!"

Note: If you ever feel compelled to "mug" yourself with a taser, one
note of caution: there is no such thing as a one-second burst when
you zap yourself. You will not let go of that thing until it is
dislodged
from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor. A three
second burst would be considered conservative.

SON-OF-A-.. that hurt like hell!!! A minute or so later (I can't be
sure,
as time was a relative thing at that point), collected my wits (what
little I had left), sat up and surveyed the landscape. My bent reading
glasses were on the mantel of the fireplace. How did they up get
there??? My triceps, right thigh and both nipples were still
twitching.
My face felt like it had been shot up with Novocain, and my bottom lip
weighed 88 lbs. I'm still looking for my testicles? I'm offering a
significant
reward for their safe return.

Still in shock
****************


H.

"Howard Eisenhauer" wrote: (clip) I decided to give myself a one-second
burst just for the heck of it. (clip)
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
1. I'm SO glad you didn't do it to the cat.
2. "Heck" is too weak a word. It's okay to say "hell" under these
conditions.
3. What did you say to your wife when she got home?
4. Did she laugh, or make comments about your intelligence?

In article ,
says...
The cat was standing
over
me making meowing sounds I had never heard before, licking my face,
undoubtedly thinking to herself, "do it again, do it again!"

She was probably thinking "Uh, oh. Who's going to feed me now?"

"Howard Eisenhauer" wrote in message
...
| Come on, admit it- This is something you've always wanted to try .
|
| **********
|
| Pocket Taser Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife? This was submitted
| by
| a guy who purchased his lovely wife a "Pocket Taser" for their
| anniversary.

Aw, that was a riot! I 'bout blew my dinner out my nose!

That one has been around a little while.

http://www.funnyfunpages.com/funny-joke-taser.htm

http://www.slashjoke.com/2005/09/09/...s-wifes-taser/

http://www.bootsandsabers.com/index....iewthread/168/


"Howard Eisenhauer" wrote in message
...
Come on, admit it- This is something you've always wanted to try .

**********

Pocket Taser Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife? This was submitted
by
a guy who purchased his lovely wife a "Pocket Taser" for their
anniversary.


Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that
sparked
my interest. The occasion was our 22nd anniversary and I was looking
for
a little something extra for my wife Toni.

What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized taser. The
effects of the taser were suppose to be short lived, with no long-term
adverse affect on your assailant, allowing her adequate time to
retreat to
safety.... WAY TOO COOL!

Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home. I loaded
two
triple-a batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button. Nothing! I
was
disappointed. I learned, however, that if I pushed the button AND
pressed it against a metal surface at the same time; I'd get the blue
arch of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs.
Awesome!!!

Unfortunately, I have yet to explain to Toni what that burn spot is on
the face of her microwave.

Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that
it
couldn't be all that bad with only two triple-a batteries,. right?!!!

There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently
(trusting
little soul) while I was reading the directions and thinking that I
really
needed to try this thing out on a flesh & blood moving target. I must
admit I thought about zapping Gracie (for a fraction of a second) and
thought better of it. She is such a sweet cat. But, if I was going to
give this thing to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did
want some assurance that it would work as advertised. Am I wrong?

So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my reading
glasses
perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand,
taser
in another. The directions said that a one-second burst would shock
and
disorient your assailant; a two-second burst was supposed to cause
muscle spasms and a major loss of bodily control; a three-second burst
would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish
out
of water. Any burst longer than three seconds would be wasting the
batteries.
All the while I'm looking at this little device measuring about 5"
long,
less than 3/4" in circumference; pretty cute really and loaded with
two itsy, bitsy triple-a batteries thinking to myself, "no possible
way!"

What happened next is almost beyond description, but I'll do my
best.....

I'm sitting there alone, Gracie looking on with her head ****ed to one
side as to say, "don't do it master," reasoning that a one-second
burst
from such a tiny little ole thing couldn't hurt all that bad.. I
decided
to give myself a one-second burst just for the heck of it. I touched
the
prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and HOLY MOTHER,
WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION@!@$$!%!@*!!!

I'm pretty sure Jessie Ventura ran in through the side door, picked me
up in the recliner, then body slammed us both on the carpet, over and
over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the
fetal
position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples on
fire,
testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm tucked under my body
in
the oddest position, and tingling in my legs. The cat was standing
over
me making meowing sounds I had never heard before, licking my face,
undoubtedly thinking to herself, "do it again, do it again!"

Note: If you ever feel compelled to "mug" yourself with a taser, one
note of caution: there is no such thing as a one-second burst when
you zap yourself. You will not let go of that thing until it is
dislodged
from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor. A three
second burst would be considered conservative.

SON-OF-A-.. that hurt like hell!!! A minute or so later (I can't be
sure,
as time was a relative thing at that point), collected my wits (what
little I had left), sat up and surveyed the landscape. My bent reading
glasses were on the mantel of the fireplace. How did they up get
there??? My triceps, right thigh and both nipples were still
twitching.
My face felt like it had been shot up with Novocain, and my bottom lip
weighed 88 lbs. I'm still looking for my testicles? I'm offering a
significant
reward for their safe return.

Still in shock
****************


H.

On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 02:29:27 GMT, Howard Eisenhauer
wrote:

Come on, admit it- This is something you've always wanted to try .
(...)

Well, I did a mild variation on the same theme to myself. I bought a
used Coleman lantern that has a pizeolectric spark gap starter. Turn
the knob on the front of the lantern and the spark ignites the propane
filled mantle.

http://www.coleman.com/coleman/colem...ategoryid=1010
Beats a match any day.

Unfortunately, someone had tried to repair this one and put it
together wrong. This is good because I was sure I could fix it.
However, when I tried it, no spark. So, I tore it apart and found
that there was a crack in the ceramic tube insulator surrounding the
base of one electrode. The spark was working, but jumping at the
crack instead of at the tip of the electrode. I rotated the tube so
that the broken pieces mated and decided it would be useful to test
the spark before I reassembled the lantern again. I pushed the button
that hammered the piezoelectric element and immediately received a
rather strong jolt. I forgot I was holding onto the hot electrode
with my other hand. Oops.

It took about an hour for me to stop shaking. Eventually, I glued the
cracked ceramic pieces back together and reassembled the lantern. It
works fine. However, every time I use the lantern, I seem to get a
psychosomatic tingling sensation. Pavlov was right.


--
# Jeff Liebermann 150 Felker St #D Santa Cruz CA 95060
# 831-336-2558
# http://802.11junk.com
# http://www.LearnByDestroying.com AE6KS

"Howard Eisenhauer" wrote in message
...
Come on, admit it- This is something you've always wanted to try .

**********

Pocket Taser Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife? This was submitted
by
a guy who purchased his lovely wife a "Pocket Taser" for their
anniversary.


Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that
sparked
my interest. The occasion was our 22nd anniversary and I was looking
for
a little something extra for my wife Toni.

What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized taser. The
effects of the taser were suppose to be short lived, with no long-term
adverse affect on your assailant, allowing her adequate time to
retreat to
safety.... WAY TOO COOL!

Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home. I loaded

Same story .. different ending. I bought a couple of the zappers from a
friend that gets them from the police supply house (whatever that is). The
little one uses a single 9 volt battery and the big one uses 2 9 volt
batteries. A few of the guys were sitting around commiserating over a jug
of JD and the little zappers came into focus. We started zapping each other
as a friendly jest and found it wasn't much of a hit. Eventually we started
zappin ourselves as it was just too implausible that these things didn't do
what they were advertised to do. These things throw a healthy 1" blue arc
without touching anything! But put em to a drunk body and they don't even
wake you up. Lots of really colorful bruises in the morning but nobody got
any more incapacitated than they already were.
As to the wife .. she prefers her .40 S&W ... the batteries never go dead

On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 02:29:27 GMT, Howard Eisenhauer
wrote:

Come on, admit it- This is something you've always wanted to try .

**********

Pocket Taser Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife? This was submitted
by
a guy who purchased his lovely wife a "Pocket Taser" for their
anniversary.

snip

At one place i was working, we used cheap barbeque/stove/gas ignitors
for static tests. They were long blue plastic things with a single aa
battery that when pressed would produce a fairly constant spark.
Fairly simple design, an oscillator connected to an autotransfomer.
The transfomer was wound with the primary well sperated from the
secondry.

Me in my infinite wisdom decided i could improve on the spark. I
removed some turns of the primary side of the coil it used, then
beefed up the switching transisor and taped 2 d cells to it. After the
mods it could pull 1" sparks.

One night i was fishing on the gold coast (brisbane) seaway ,near a
spot where the local car hoods hang out, when the police decided to
block all exits and fine anybody with anything they could. They
searched my car and found the modified gas lighter and tried to say it
was a concealed weapon. Fortunately a superior noted the fishing gear
and realised i was not a hoon. He still made me break up the gas
lighter though.

On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 07:10:33 GMT, Jeff Liebermann
wrote:

On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 02:29:27 GMT, Howard Eisenhauer
wrote:

Come on, admit it- This is something you've always wanted to try .
(...)

Well, I did a mild variation on the same theme to myself. I bought a
used Coleman lantern that has a pizeolectric spark gap starter. Turn
the knob on the front of the lantern and the spark ignites the propane
filled mantle.

http://www.coleman.com/coleman/colem...ategoryid=1010
Beats a match any day.

Unfortunately, someone had tried to repair this one and put it
together wrong. This is good because I was sure I could fix it.
However, when I tried it, no spark. So, I tore it apart and found
that there was a crack in the ceramic tube insulator surrounding the
base of one electrode. The spark was working, but jumping at the
crack instead of at the tip of the electrode. I rotated the tube so
that the broken pieces mated and decided it would be useful to test
the spark before I reassembled the lantern again. I pushed the button
that hammered the piezoelectric element and immediately received a
rather strong jolt. I forgot I was holding onto the hot electrode
with my other hand. Oops.

It took about an hour for me to stop shaking. Eventually, I glued the
cracked ceramic pieces back together and reassembled the lantern. It
works fine. However, every time I use the lantern, I seem to get a
psychosomatic tingling sensation. Pavlov was right.

At a meeting..the boss was figiting with an early stun gun..took 9vt
batts. About the size of a small walkie talkie. This was a rather
powerful bitch..and it would indeed jump the arc across the prongs.
Garland was pushing the button, watching the arc..putting it down etc
etc as the meeting progressed. He started scracthing his neck with
his free hand..well..

At some point he decided to scratch his neck..and pushed the button at
the same time. There was a muffled ZZZZAAAPPPPPPPPP and suddenly no
Garland..just the slowly revolving casters on the bottom of his chair
were visible over the top of his desk.

Running around the desk..we observed him upside down..ass pressed
against the wall..his head tucked under him. We grabbed him and got
him back into the chair...and I swear his eyes were wandering in
different directions at the same time. The 4 of us returned to our
chairs..and continued discussing the issues. About 15 minutes
later..he started to focus again. We made no acknowlegement that he
had fried his nervous system....the poor ******* was confused as hell.
He sorta remembered parts of it...and here we were..making like
nothing had happened. It took him a couple days before we clued him
in.

I used the "stun gun" on a some people during my short time as a cop,
way back when there was no policy against them. Two drunks were
whipping on each other..and finally one got a death grip on the throat
of the other..about the time I showed up. One guy was turning a
lovely shade of purple and the lights were going out in his eyes..the
other appeared to be in a trance..and refused to even acknowlege I was
there. So I put it against his spine, just above the belt line..and
lit him up. He simultainiously **** and ****ed himself as he was
spasming on the ground..doing "the chicken"

The second time was a fellow who decided to grab me by the neck from
behind in a bar fight. I managed to get the toy off my belt..and hold
it against his crotch..then lit him up. He..let go. He laid on the
floor for quite some time making a sound Id never heard
before..something a cat or bagpipe would make while being slowly
crushed by a cement roller....just really really prolonged.

It was an interesting tool..always worked..unlike Mace or pepper
spray...even on the worst druggie wacked out of his melon. But..you
had to get to contact range to use it.

Gunner



"A prudent man foresees the difficulties ahead and prepares for them;
the simpleton goes blindly on and suffers the consequences."
- Proverbs 22:3

Great, reminds me of a chap I knew in high school who admitted ****ing
on an electric cattle fence. He said he didn't feel quite right for
about a week.

Howard Eisenhauer wrote:

Come on, admit it- This is something you've always wanted to try .

**********

Pocket Taser Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife? This was submitted
by
a guy who purchased his lovely wife a "Pocket Taser" for their
anniversary.


Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that
sparked
my interest. The occasion was our 22nd anniversary and I was looking
for
a little something extra for my wife Toni.

What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized taser. The
effects of the taser were suppose to be short lived, with no long-term
adverse affect on your assailant, allowing her adequate time to
retreat to
safety.... WAY TOO COOL!

Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home. I loaded
two
triple-a batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button. Nothing! I
was
disappointed. I learned, however, that if I pushed the button AND
pressed it against a metal surface at the same time; I'd get the blue
arch of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs.
Awesome!!!

Unfortunately, I have yet to explain to Toni what that burn spot is on
the face of her microwave.

Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that
it
couldn't be all that bad with only two triple-a batteries,. right?!!!

There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently
(trusting
little soul) while I was reading the directions and thinking that I
really
needed to try this thing out on a flesh & blood moving target. I must
admit I thought about zapping Gracie (for a fraction of a second) and
thought better of it. She is such a sweet cat. But, if I was going to
give this thing to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did
want some assurance that it would work as advertised. Am I wrong?

So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my reading
glasses
perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand,
taser
in another. The directions said that a one-second burst would shock
and
disorient your assailant; a two-second burst was supposed to cause
muscle spasms and a major loss of bodily control; a three-second burst
would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish
out
of water. Any burst longer than three seconds would be wasting the
batteries.
All the while I'm looking at this little device measuring about 5"
long,
less than 3/4" in circumference; pretty cute really and loaded with
two itsy, bitsy triple-a batteries thinking to myself, "no possible
way!"

What happened next is almost beyond description, but I'll do my
best.....

I'm sitting there alone, Gracie looking on with her head ****ed to one
side as to say, "don't do it master," reasoning that a one-second
burst
from such a tiny little ole thing couldn't hurt all that bad.. I
decided
to give myself a one-second burst just for the heck of it. I touched
the
prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and HOLY MOTHER,
WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION@!@$$!%!@*!!!

I'm pretty sure Jessie Ventura ran in through the side door, picked me
up in the recliner, then body slammed us both on the carpet, over and
over and over again. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the
fetal
position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples on
fire,
testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm tucked under my body
in
the oddest position, and tingling in my legs. The cat was standing
over
me making meowing sounds I had never heard before, licking my face,
undoubtedly thinking to herself, "do it again, do it again!"

Note: If you ever feel compelled to "mug" yourself with a taser, one
note of caution: there is no such thing as a one-second burst when
you zap yourself. You will not let go of that thing until it is
dislodged
from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor. A three
second burst would be considered conservative.

SON-OF-A-.. that hurt like hell!!! A minute or so later (I can't be
sure,
as time was a relative thing at that point), collected my wits (what
little I had left), sat up and surveyed the landscape. My bent reading
glasses were on the mantel of the fireplace. How did they up get
there??? My triceps, right thigh and both nipples were still
twitching.
My face felt like it had been shot up with Novocain, and my bottom lip
weighed 88 lbs. I'm still looking for my testicles? I'm offering a
significant
reward for their safe return.

Still in shock
****************


H.

On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 12:39:50 +0000, David Billington
wrote:

Great, reminds me of a chap I knew in high school who admitted ****ing
on an electric cattle fence. He said he didn't feel quite right for
about a week.

Myth Busters did a segment on that one---it was busted -no chance
of even a tingle wizzing on a hot fence.

But fence energizers a good source of entertainment when city folk
are out for a visit.....my Parmak MK 5 will flat knock you down if you
try and squeeze through it and touch it with your back while touching
the ground wire. Dogs are particularly sensitive to shocks, cured
the rottweiler down the road from coming around. The owner says
he wont go near a fence for some reason.....

ED

----== Posted via Newsfeeds.Com - Unlimited-Unrestricted-Secure Usenet News==----
http://www.newsfeeds.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! 120,000+ Newsgroups
----= East and West-Coast Server Farms - Total Privacy via Encryption =----

On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 03:52:22 GMT, with neither quill nor qualm, Carl
Smith quickly quoth:

In article ,
says...
The cat was standing
over
me making meowing sounds I had never heard before, licking my face,
undoubtedly thinking to herself, "do it again, do it again!"

She was probably thinking "Uh, oh. Who's going to feed me now?"

....as Carl's wife (who was looking over his shoulder as he typed that)
goes out and buys the same model taser to use on him...


--------------------------------------------------------------------
The more we gripe, * http://www.diversify.com/stees.html
the longer God makes us live. * Graphic Design - Humorous T-shirts

David Billington wrote:

Great, reminds me of a chap I knew in high school who admitted ****ing
on an electric cattle fence. He said he didn't feel quite right for
about a week.


A friend of mine who used to work at the Middletown, ohio Armco steel
plant told me that they worked with a moron who was too lazy to take the
quarter mile walk to the nearest rest room when he needed to take a
****. he would just open his zipper, whip it out and **** into the
grates that collected the used cooling water. Another moron hooked a
wire to it, and into a nearby breaker box with no current limiting.
Moron #1 walks up, unzips, and grabs hold of the railing to take his
****. He let out a scream that was heard almost a mile away inside the
mill, over all the machinery. Moron #2 had tied the wire to a 480 200
amp circuit. He hurried over and removed the wire before the safety
inspector got there, but moron #1 ALWAYS walked to the rest room after
that incident. Its a wonder that it didn't kill him.


--
Service to my country? Been there, Done that, and I've got my DD214 to
prove it.
Member of DAV #85.

Michael A. Terrell
Central Florida

Glenn wrote:
"Howard Eisenhauer" wrote in message
...

Come on, admit it- This is something you've always wanted to try .

**********

Pocket Taser Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife? This was submitted
by
a guy who purchased his lovely wife a "Pocket Taser" for their
anniversary.


Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that
sparked
my interest. The occasion was our 22nd anniversary and I was looking
for
a little something extra for my wife Toni.

What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized taser. The
effects of the taser were suppose to be short lived, with no long-term
adverse affect on your assailant, allowing her adequate time to
retreat to
safety.... WAY TOO COOL!

Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home. I loaded


Same story .. different ending. I bought a couple of the zappers from a
friend that gets them from the police supply house (whatever that is). The
little one uses a single 9 volt battery and the big one uses 2 9 volt
batteries. A few of the guys were sitting around commiserating over a jug
of JD and the little zappers came into focus. We started zapping each other
as a friendly jest and found it wasn't much of a hit. Eventually we started
zappin ourselves as it was just too implausible that these things didn't do
what they were advertised to do. These things throw a healthy 1" blue arc
without touching anything! But put em to a drunk body and they don't even
wake you up. Lots of really colorful bruises in the morning but nobody got
any more incapacitated than they already were.
As to the wife .. she prefers her .40 S&W ... the batteries never go dead


That's what I found as well.
Back in the 80s when these were legal in Britain my brother used to take
one down the pub to use on friends. Ideally just as they took a swig.
One should not stand directly behind the victim. I tried it out on the
girlfriend's posterior and got a quite notable effect, but far from one
of electrocuted passivity:-)

They might make pretty good weapons for mugging little old ladies, but
for self defence they are ****. *Nobody* is going to let you hold one
onto their body for the required 3+ seconds it takes to work
effectively, in the same way that nobody is going to let a rabid dog
savage them for the same length of time without fighting back.

Dirk

Howard Eisenhauer wrote:
Come on, admit it- This is something you've always wanted to try .



sniped


All the while I'm looking at this little device measuring about 5"
long,
less than 3/4" in circumference; pretty cute really and loaded with
two itsy, bitsy triple-a batteries thinking to myself, "no possible
way!"

C'mon Howard, this is rcm y'know.

Most guys here would quickly pick up on 3/4" circumference equaling less
that 1/4" diameter. You can't fit AAA bateries (.41" diameter) in that,
so I knew it was a bull**** story right there.


Jeff


--
Jeffry Wisnia

(W1BSV + Brass Rat '57 EE)

"Truth exists; only falsehood has to be invented."

Come on, admit it- This is something you've always wanted to try .


C'mon, be honest. Is there anyone here who hasn't tried the lawnmower spark
plug wire? Or at least talked/tricked their brother/sister into trying it?

Here. Hold this.

Steve

"DE" wrote in message
...
On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 12:39:50 +0000, David Billington
wrote:

Great, reminds me of a chap I knew in high school who admitted ****ing
on an electric cattle fence. He said he didn't feel quite right for
about a week.

Myth Busters did a segment on that one---it was busted -no chance
of even a tingle wizzing on a hot fence.

But fence energizers a good source of entertainment when city folk
are out for a visit.....my Parmak MK 5 will flat knock you down if you
try and squeeze through it and touch it with your back while touching
the ground wire. Dogs are particularly sensitive to shocks, cured
the rottweiler down the road from coming around. The owner says
he wont go near a fence for some reason.....

ED


I got a FidoShock that I use for dogs that want to get into the trash can,
or come **** on my rims. One time, and if the dog comes around on a leash,
its owner has to literally drag it past my house.

I don't see how it would not shock you if you ****ed on it, though. If you
were wearing rubber soled shoes, it wouldn't get you, but if you were
barefooted, I think it would. Would you try it out and get back to us?

I am also going to use my FiShock this year at our cabin for rodent control.
Wires over a shallow pan of water. Heard it works good. I particularly
want to get one chipmunk that has taken up residency in the siding.

Steve

On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 13:02:50 -0500, Jeff Wisnia wrote:
Howard Eisenhauer wrote:
....
sniped

so I knew it was a bull**** story right there.

You certainly did. ;-)

Cheers!
Rich
--
Elect Me President in 2008! I will:
A. Fire the IRS, and abolish the income tax
B. Legalize drugs
C. Stand down all military actions by the US that don't involve actual
military aggression against US territory
D. Declare World Peace I.

In article ,
"Rich Grise, PLainclothes Hippie" wrote:

Elect Me President in 2008! I will:
A. Fire the IRS, and abolish the income tax
B. Legalize drugs
C. Stand down all military actions by the US that don't involve actual
military aggression against US territory
D. Declare World Peace I.

You got my vote.

--
Free men own guns, slaves don't
www.geocities.com/CapitolHill/5357/

On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 21:47:06 GMT, Nick Hull wrote:
In article ,
"Rich Grise, PLainclothes Hippie" wrote:

Elect Me President in 2008! I will:
A. Fire the IRS, and abolish the income tax
B. Legalize drugs
C. Stand down all military actions by the US that don't involve actual
military aggression against US territory
D. Declare World Peace I.

You got my vote.

Great. Who pays for the roads, police & fire & EMS protection, and all
those things then?

In article QilPf.588$wp.547@fed1read12,
"Steve B" wrote:

I don't see how it would not shock you if you ****ed on it, though. If you
were wearing rubber soled shoes, it wouldn't get you, but if you were
barefooted, I think it would. Would you try it out and get back to us?

pee is in droplets; the air in between insulates.

--
Free men own guns, slaves don't
www.geocities.com/CapitolHill/5357/

On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 21:50:53 GMT, Nick Hull wrote:
In article QilPf.588$wp.547@fed1read12,
"Steve B" wrote:

I don't see how it would not shock you if you ****ed on it, though. If you
were wearing rubber soled shoes, it wouldn't get you, but if you were
barefooted, I think it would. Would you try it out and get back to us?

pee is in droplets; the air in between insulates.

Mythbusters just tackled the ****ing on the third rail question. Short
version: you don't have the flow needed to conduct. That said, I still
wouldn't do it.

On 7 Mar 2006 21:50:28 GMT, Dave Hinz wrote:

On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 21:47:06 GMT, Nick Hull wrote:
In article ,
"Rich Grise, PLainclothes Hippie" wrote:

Elect Me President in 2008! I will:
A. Fire the IRS, and abolish the income tax
B. Legalize drugs
C. Stand down all military actions by the US that don't involve actual
military aggression against US territory
D. Declare World Peace I.

You got my vote.

Great. Who pays for the roads, police & fire & EMS protection, and all
those things then?

It's Rich's treat ;-)

Let's hear it for a regressive income tax ;-)

...Jim Thompson
--
| James E.Thompson, P.E. | mens |
| Analog Innovations, Inc. | et |
| Analog/Mixed-Signal ASIC's and Discrete Systems | manus |
| Phoenix, Arizona Voice480)460-2350 | |
| E-mail Address at Website Fax480)460-2142 | Brass Rat |
| http://www.analog-innovations.com | 1962 |

It's what you learn, after you know it all, that counts.

"Nick Hull" wrote in message
...
In article QilPf.588$wp.547@fed1read12,
"Steve B" wrote:

I don't see how it would not shock you if you ****ed on it, though. If
you
were wearing rubber soled shoes, it wouldn't get you, but if you were
barefooted, I think it would. Would you try it out and get back to us?

pee is in droplets; the air in between insulates.

--
Free men own guns, slaves don't
www.geocities.com/CapitolHill/5357/

Funny. I've been watching mine for years and years and years now. I never
noticed it is in droplets. It looks like a stream to me.

I guess, though, it has a lot to do with the size of your hose. I can see
how some guys would do the droplets thing, but my equipment puts out a
steady stream. For the first half of the performance, anyway, and depending
on how many beers or ice teas I have had.

Steve

"Dave Hinz" wrote in message
...
On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 21:50:53 GMT, Nick Hull wrote:
In article QilPf.588$wp.547@fed1read12,
"Steve B" wrote:

I don't see how it would not shock you if you ****ed on it, though. If
you
were wearing rubber soled shoes, it wouldn't get you, but if you were
barefooted, I think it would. Would you try it out and get back to us?

pee is in droplets; the air in between insulates.

Mythbusters just tackled the ****ing on the third rail question. Short
version: you don't have the flow needed to conduct. That said, I still
wouldn't do it.


But, was the rail on the ground, or up closer to the head of yer pecker? I
can see that on a long stream, it would start to break apart. But on a
short stream close up to the source, like electric wires are hung, that it
would be possible to get a connection.

But, like you say, I will let others find out. And I guess I can forget
about the time my friend peed on one and got shocked. He was pretty close
to it.

I guess, according to Mythbusters, I really didn't see and hear what I saw
and heard.

Steve

In article ,
Nick Hull wrote:

In article QilPf.588$wp.547@fed1read12,
"Steve B" wrote:

I don't see how it would not shock you if you ****ed on it, though. If you
were wearing rubber soled shoes, it wouldn't get you, but if you were
barefooted, I think it would. Would you try it out and get back to us?

pee is in droplets; the air in between insulates.

Tell that to the solid stream the one-eyed trouser snake produces when I
visit the loo... (usually... "bifurcated stream" is annoying when it
happens)

And while you're at it, tell it to my little brother, who found out just
how hard an electric fence can bite through a stream of pee. I damaged
myself laughing at that one, I'm sure. Then, since I was "big brother,
and supposed to know better", I got paddled so hard I could have passed
as a baboon hooker for days afterwards - Or so it seemed... The worst
part was I didn't point him at the fence! I didn't even vaguely hint at
possibly suggesting that maybe he should perhaps consider thinking about
choosing that corner to pee in! I was an honest-to-goodness innocent
bystander who simply couldn't help laughing at his plight. But I still
took the ass-whoopin' for "making him do it".

sigh It really is true... There ain't no justice!

But was it worth it? DAMN SKIPPY!!! 30 years later, I still can't get
the image of the poor little booger standing there with his
micro-schlong in hand, his whole body stiff and jiggling slightly, and
making this moan that's beyond describing in text!

--
Don Bruder - - If your "From:" address isn't on my whitelist,
or the subject of the message doesn't contain the exact text "PopperAndShadow"
somewhere, any message sent to this address will go in the garbage without my
ever knowing it arrived. Sorry... http://www.sonic.net/~dakidd for more info

"Don Bruder" wrote in message
...
In article ,
Nick Hull wrote:

In article QilPf.588$wp.547@fed1read12,
"Steve B" wrote:

I don't see how it would not shock you if you ****ed on it, though. If
you
were wearing rubber soled shoes, it wouldn't get you, but if you were
barefooted, I think it would. Would you try it out and get back to us?

pee is in droplets; the air in between insulates.

Tell that to the solid stream the one-eyed trouser snake produces when I
visit the loo... (usually... "bifurcated stream" is annoying when it
happens)

And while you're at it, tell it to my little brother, who found out just
how hard an electric fence can bite through a stream of pee. I damaged
myself laughing at that one, I'm sure. Then, since I was "big brother,
and supposed to know better", I got paddled so hard I could have passed
as a baboon hooker for days afterwards - Or so it seemed... The worst
part was I didn't point him at the fence! I didn't even vaguely hint at
possibly suggesting that maybe he should perhaps consider thinking about
choosing that corner to pee in! I was an honest-to-goodness innocent
bystander who simply couldn't help laughing at his plight. But I still
took the ass-whoopin' for "making him do it".

sigh It really is true... There ain't no justice!

But was it worth it? DAMN SKIPPY!!! 30 years later, I still can't get
the image of the poor little booger standing there with his
micro-schlong in hand, his whole body stiff and jiggling slightly, and
making this moan that's beyond describing in text!


Yet, according to Mythbusters, that can't/didn't happen.

Guess you and I must live in a parallel universe where things like that can
and do happen.

Whenever a female in my life has made comments about getting pee on the seat
or the floor, I just said, "The bigger the hose, the bigger the mess."

That usually brings on a slight grin and a thousand mile stare.

Steve

On Tue, 7 Mar 2006 16:22:52 -0800, "bg" wrote:


Note: If you ever feel compelled to "mug" yourself with a taser, one
note of caution: there is no such thing as a one-second burst when
you zap yourself. You will not let go of that thing until it is
dislodged
from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor. A three
second burst would be considered conservative.


Obviously you are a novice -
The proper procedure for testing these things is to anchor the unit to the
ceiling with a short string and duct tape. Stand on a chair and push the
button. As you fall off the chair, your hand will release the button, thus
preventing muscular lock up.
bg

Particularly if you use a noose to slow your fall ?:-)

...Jim Thompson
--
| James E.Thompson, P.E. | mens |
| Analog Innovations, Inc. | et |
| Analog/Mixed-Signal ASIC's and Discrete Systems | manus |
| Phoenix, Arizona Voice480)460-2350 | |
| E-mail Address at Website Fax480)460-2142 | Brass Rat |
| http://www.analog-innovations.com | 1962 |

It's what you learn, after you know it all, that counts.

"Steve B" wrote in message
news:kyoPf.608$wp.564@fed1read12...

"Don Bruder" wrote in message news:440e0fa7$0$96008
micro-schlong in hand, his whole body stiff and jiggling slightly, and
making this moan that's beyond describing in text!


Yet, according to Mythbusters, that can't/didn't happen.


Actually, what the mythbusters found was that you couldn't get electrocuted
by peeing on the third rail from a standing start.

They found that if you were on your knees in front of the rail you could get
a jolt.

Most electric fence wires I've seen, are closer to the end of my willie than
my knees are.


Paul K.Dickman

In article kyoPf.608$wp.564@fed1read12,
"Steve B" wrote:

"Don Bruder" wrote in message
...
In article ,
Nick Hull wrote:

In article QilPf.588$wp.547@fed1read12,
"Steve B" wrote:

I don't see how it would not shock you if you ****ed on it, though. If
you
were wearing rubber soled shoes, it wouldn't get you, but if you were
barefooted, I think it would. Would you try it out and get back to us?

pee is in droplets; the air in between insulates.

Tell that to the solid stream the one-eyed trouser snake produces when I
visit the loo... (usually... "bifurcated stream" is annoying when it
happens)

And while you're at it, tell it to my little brother, who found out just
how hard an electric fence can bite through a stream of pee. I damaged
myself laughing at that one, I'm sure. Then, since I was "big brother,
and supposed to know better", I got paddled so hard I could have passed
as a baboon hooker for days afterwards - Or so it seemed... The worst
part was I didn't point him at the fence! I didn't even vaguely hint at
possibly suggesting that maybe he should perhaps consider thinking about
choosing that corner to pee in! I was an honest-to-goodness innocent
bystander who simply couldn't help laughing at his plight. But I still
took the ass-whoopin' for "making him do it".

sigh It really is true... There ain't no justice!

But was it worth it? DAMN SKIPPY!!! 30 years later, I still can't get
the image of the poor little booger standing there with his
micro-schlong in hand, his whole body stiff and jiggling slightly, and
making this moan that's beyond describing in text!


Yet, according to Mythbusters, that can't/didn't happen.

Heh... Send 'em out to my place... They can "bust" that "myth", and I'll
film it for amusement value. And I know damn well it *WILL* be amusing -
At least for me. They might tend to disagree (between yelps of pain) but
I'll be highly amused.

These days, it's more difficult to get it to happen, since almost every
fencer available today is the "chopper" type - Pulse... Pulse...
Pulse... The timing has to be right, or the stream contact has to be
prolonged.

Back in the days of the "constantly-hot" type (wire the primary of a
car's ignition coil to an outlet, sink a ground stake and hook up the
neutral to that, then power the fence off the secondary tower) it was
*REAL* easy to get yourself in some *REALLY SERIOUS* - as in potentially
deadly - hurt messing with an electric fence.

--
Don Bruder - - If your "From:" address isn't on my whitelist,
or the subject of the message doesn't contain the exact text "PopperAndShadow"
somewhere, any message sent to this address will go in the garbage without my
ever knowing it arrived. Sorry... http://www.sonic.net/~dakidd for more info

Dave Hinz wrote:
On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 21:50:53 GMT, Nick Hull wrote:
In article QilPf.588$wp.547@fed1read12,
"Steve B" wrote:

I don't see how it would not shock you if you ****ed on it, though. If you
were wearing rubber soled shoes, it wouldn't get you, but if you were
barefooted, I think it would. Would you try it out and get back to us?

pee is in droplets; the air in between insulates.

Mythbusters just tackled the ****ing on the third rail question. Short
version: you don't have the flow needed to conduct. That said, I still
wouldn't do it.




Some years ago I read a short article in a railfan-type magazine about
a drunk who was killed after he stopped on a RR overpass in England and
took a leak onto a 50,000 volt catenary wire below. Apparently the
voltage makes a difference.

Mike

On Tue, 7 Mar 2006 14:23:19 -0800, "Steve B" wrote:


"Nick Hull" wrote in message
...
In article QilPf.588$wp.547@fed1read12,
"Steve B" wrote:

I don't see how it would not shock you if you ****ed on it, though. If
you
were wearing rubber soled shoes, it wouldn't get you, but if you were
barefooted, I think it would. Would you try it out and get back to us?

pee is in droplets; the air in between insulates.

--
Free men own guns, slaves don't
www.geocities.com/CapitolHill/5357/

Funny. I've been watching mine for years and years and years now. I never
noticed it is in droplets. It looks like a stream to me.

I guess, though, it has a lot to do with the size of your hose. I can see
how some guys would do the droplets thing, but my equipment puts out a
steady stream. For the first half of the performance, anyway, and depending
on how many beers or ice teas I have had.

Steve


It's really not something that you would rely upon to avoid getting your
wedding tackle blown off though is it? If I'm going to be ****ing on any
fences or railway iron, then I want to be sure that they are not energised,
what ever the television people say.


Mark Rand
RTFM

On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 14:54:30 -0700, Jim Thompson wrote:
On 7 Mar 2006 21:50:28 GMT, Dave Hinz wrote:
On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 21:47:06 GMT, Nick Hull
wrote:
"Rich Grise, PLainclothes Hippie"
wrote:

Elect Me President in 2008! I will:
A. Fire the IRS, and abolish the income tax B. Legalize drugs
C. Stand down all military actions by the US that don't involve
actual
military aggression against US territory
D. Declare World Peace I.

You got my vote.

Great. Who pays for the roads, police & fire & EMS protection, and all
those things then?

It's Rich's treat ;-)

Let's hear it for a regressive income tax ;-)

...Jim Thompson

How about just going back to the way it once was, where a person took care
of his/her own needs, then the family, and if there were issues that
couldn't be dealt with at a family level, then there are communities, and
so on -

BUT!!!!

Just because there are big issues that need more than a local scope,
doesn't mean that the big guys should take over the local issues as well.

And there should never have been any sort of income tax -
--------------
Article XVI.
The Congress shall have power to lay and collect taxes on incomes, from
whatever source derived, without apportionment among the several States,
and without regard to any census or enumeration.

Proposal and Ratification
The sixteenth amendment to the Constitution of the United States was
proposed to the legislatures of the several States by the Sixty-first
Congress on the 12th of July, 1909, and was declared, in a proclamation of
the Secretary of State, dated the 25th of February, 1913, to have been
ratified by 36 of the 48 States. The dates of ratification we Alabama,
August 10, 1909; Kentucky, February 8, 1910; South Carolina, February 19,
1910; Illinois, March 1, 1910; Mississippi, March 7, 1910; Oklahoma, March
10, 1910; Maryland, April 8, 1910; Georgia, August 3, 1910; Texas, August
16, 1910; Ohio, January 19, 1911; Idaho, January 20, 1911; Oregon, January
23, 1911; Washington, January 26, 1911; Montana, January 30, 1911;
Indiana, January 30, 1911; California, January 31, 1911; Nevada, January
31, 1911; South Dakota, February 3, 1911; Nebraska, February 9, 1911;
North Carolina, February 11, 1911; Colorado, February 15, 1911; North
Dakota, February 17, 1911; Kansas, February 18, 1911; Michigan, February
23, 1911; Iowa, February 24, 1911; Missouri, March 16, 1911; Maine, March
31, 1911; Tennessee, April 7, 1911; Arkansas, April 22, 1911 (after having
rejected it earlier); Wisconsin, May 26, 1911; New York, July 12, 1911;
Arizona, April 6, 1912; Minnesota, June 11, 1912; Louisiana, June 28,
1912; West Virginia, January 31, 1913; New Mexico, February 3, 1913.
Ratification was completed on February 3, 1913. The amendment was
subsequently ratified by Massachusetts, March 4, 1913; New Hampshire,
March 7, 1913 (after having rejected it on March 2, 1911). The amendment
was rejected (and not subsequently ratified) by Connecticut, Rhode Island,
and Utah.
--- http://www.house.gov/house/Constitution/Amend.html

That was the day they signed the death warrant for Liberty and Justice in
the USA, and consigned her to the same landfill as all of the other
communist and socialist regimes. It's just a matter of time.

Unless, of course, you Elect Me President in 2008! I will:
A. Fire the IRS, and abolish the income tax
B. Legalize drugs
C. Stand down all military actions by the US that don't involve actual
military aggression against US territory
D. Declare World Peace I.

Cheers!
Rich

On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 13:02:50 -0500, Jeff Wisnia
wrote:

C'mon Howard, this is rcm y'know.

Most guys here would quickly pick up on 3/4" circumference equaling less
that 1/4" diameter. You can't fit AAA bateries (.41" diameter) in that,
so I knew it was a bull**** story right there.


Jeff

Well, bugger me! I had to go out to the workshop and measure one, they don't
look that big for some reason.

Turns out that the one I measured was 0.402" diameter, but they still _look_
smaller. Weird!


Mark Rand
RTFM

Note: If you ever feel compelled to "mug" yourself with a taser, one
note of caution: there is no such thing as a one-second burst when
you zap yourself. You will not let go of that thing until it is
dislodged
from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor. A three
second burst would be considered conservative.


Obviously you are a novice -
The proper procedure for testing these things is to anchor the unit to the
ceiling with a short string and duct tape. Stand on a chair and push the
button. As you fall off the chair, your hand will release the button, thus
preventing muscular lock up.
bg

On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 07:22:00 -0700, DE
wrote:


Myth Busters did a segment on that one---it was busted -no chance
of even a tingle wizzing on a hot fence.

I am wrong- googled myth busters and low and behold Adam
did get a thrill from wizzing on the wire.

Must not of had a heavy load on the fence and was grounded good.
I've seen dogs get bit for wetting the wire but they're barefoot and
closer.

I wouldn't even think of leaning on the post and trying it but in
rubber soled boots on dry ground not much to worry about.

As a kid we had a bare "electric fence" wire that laid on the ground
around the farm yard and turned the sheep out to keep things mowed.
Now that wire was nothing to step on in your bare feet. The sheep
would graze up to it and stop, come to think of it my uncle used it
to collect worms for fishing. Not the same as the energizers we
use today, high voltage, low impedance type. The old ones
could leak and make a water tank along ways off hot.
When that happened it was hard to get the critters back
to drinking.

ED

----== Posted via Newsfeeds.Com - Unlimited-Unrestricted-Secure Usenet News==----
http://www.newsfeeds.com The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! 120,000+ Newsgroups
----= East and West-Coast Server Farms - Total Privacy via Encryption =----

That is an interesting STORY...

I have one of my own to sha

bare, WET skin, 9v battery operated stun gun.

Party in San Francisco. Everyone just got out of
the pool, sitting on the couch watching TV.

We played with the gun, shocking eachother for
about 4 hours. It will make you twitch, and it
hurts, but only while being shocked.

There is no way to hold the gun to yourself while
pulling the trigger, unless you have very good
concentration skills. The natural reaction is to
get the thing the hell away from your skin (some
of the participants would throw the gun each time
they shocked themselves)

No marks, no lasting effects, tried on 6 different
people, repeatedly.

This is different from the "taser" weapon that cops
in the USA have been killing people with.

Rich

On Tue, 7 Mar 2006 11:31:33 -0800, "Steve B"
wrote:

Come on, admit it- This is something you've always wanted to try .


C'mon, be honest. Is there anyone here who hasn't tried the lawnmower spark
plug wire? Or at least talked/tricked their brother/sister into trying it?

Here. Hold this.

Steve

My favourite was the telephone magneto. I had been asked to clean one
up in the shop, so when I was finished I brought it back to the
classroom during lunch break. Several friends were gathered, so I
quietly arranged thins such that one end of the group was touching the
aluminium edging on the windowsill, as was the magneto, and while
someone turned the crank, I, holding the hot terminal, touched the
girlfriend on the posterior causing a rapid fire bleating sound. She
eventually did forgive not only myself, but the rest of the group, but
id did cost me some special favors over the next few weeks.
Gerry :-)}
London, Canada

On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 17:27:02 -0700, DE wrote:
On Tue, 07 Mar 2006 07:22:00 -0700, DE
wrote:


Myth Busters did a segment on that one---it was busted -no chance
of even a tingle wizzing on a hot fence.

I am wrong- googled myth busters and low and behold Adam
did get a thrill from wizzing on the wire.

Only after giving Buster a .500" diameter urethra. Remember the shots
of them taking a drill to him cringe?

On 7 Mar 2006 16:30:28 -0800, wrote:



This is different from the "taser" weapon that cops
in the USA have been killing people with.

Rich
We have been having a bit of controversy up here in the frozen North
lately and I agree with the "bleeding hearts" that the taser should be
banned. Lets have the police go back to using the Glock when they are
being threatened and save a whole lot of tax money.
Gerry :-)}
London, Canada