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Default Artistry (!?!?!) at the Keyboard

On Jun 3, 5:58 am, "L. Credit Where Due T."
wrote:
On Jun 3, 6:48 am, Dan Tritter wrote:





Mickey wrote:
HiC wrote:
With countless conservatories, colleges, armies of talented theatrical
singers, there have to be many excellent singers out there. Why do so
many second-raters like Josh Groban, Andrea Bocelli, Hayley Westenra,
Charlotte Church, etc. get promoted? Surely there are good singers who
are photogenic. Wouldn't it be just as easy to promote a true talent?


The short answer is that some very important singing and performer
skills are almost never taught in conservatories or colleges. (If you
are wondering what they might be, listen to the 3 tenors butcher songs
from American musical theater. It ain't just the accents.) As for
singers in musical theater, many of them don't sing all that well. So if
you're David Foster or Simon Cowell looking for something you can
readily peddle to an ignorant public, you don't go hunting for talent,
you go looking for the hunk of meat most like what you know you can
sell... And you look for a gimmick.


The whole Celtic women thing is just more River Dance muck dressed up in
a new package, senza Michael Flatley. Sarah Brightman is a prepackaged
nightmare courtesy of ALW and POTO. Find some cute with baby fat
teenager whose chin wobbles like a 70 year old while mumbling her way
through Puccini and you've got your next PBS fund drive superstar. I'm
bet there's even some enterprising smuck out there trying to find a
blind tenor with 2 wooden legs to form up a song and danceteam with
Heather Mills.


In short, it's a lot easier to sell novelty than it is to sell quality.
If I'm reading the trends correctly, next year's Idol winner will be a
500 lb. beat boxing, transexual former sumo wrestler with Tourette's
Syndrome who'll yell "holy crap" every 30 seconds.


The Other Mickey


bring back alvin and the chipmonks.


Any and all of whom could sing some 567 Decillion times better than
Simian Slaturde (aka, Merdie) can 'play' its three useless, atonal
keyboards. Richard Garmise

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