http://www.kidsdomain.com/craft/blocks1.html I see some of you people
looking for simple projects again. Well, this ought to make you happy.
I'm sure most of you can make a block. If nothing else, get a section
of 2X2, or 4X4, and then cut it into chunks. Or, if you can't even use
a rulser, to make square blocks, you should be able to buy blocks
somewhere. Uh, you can make some for other holidays to, if you want,
not just for Christmas. If you're gonna make something like this, you
might as well get as much mileage as you can.

JOAT
Failure is not an option.
But it is definitely a possibility.

Life just ain't life without good music. - JOAT
Web Page Update 8 Sep 2003. Some tunes I like.
http://community-2.webtv.net/Jakofal...OMETUNESILIKE/

JOAT's post reminded me of something I posted a long time ago. Since
I wrote this, we have come to an un-easy truce as regards woodworking
matters. And before you jump on me for not making nice with the old
guy- remember, this is part B.S. and there are other factors I choose
not to wrote about.

-Dan

On Mon, 8 Sep 2003 02:44:45 -0400 (EDT),
(Jack-of-all-trades - JOAT) wrote:

http://www.kidsdomain.com/craft/blocks1.html I see some of you people
looking for simple projects again. Well, this ought to make you happy.
I'm sure most of you can make a block. If nothing else, get a section
of 2X2, or 4X4, and then cut it into chunks. Or, if you can't even use
a rulser, to make square blocks, you should be able to buy blocks
somewhere. Uh, you can make some for other holidays to, if you want,
not just for Christmas. If you're gonna make something like this, you
might as well get as much mileage as you can.




I wrote this as a way to blow off some steam- it is not entirely all
true, I bull ****ted a little. I ain't sayin' how much, or where.
Just that I bull ****ted some. Thought the newsgroup might enjoy it.
If anyone should happen to recognize who I am, or who my father-in-law
is, please don't tell the family about this. They would possibly not
enjoy it. Hope you do though-
~~~~~~~~~
Blocks......

When my father-in-law retired a few years back, he told me how he was
going to become a by-god wood worker, now that he would have the time.
Going to darn near move out of the house and into the shop, he said.
He retired early from a part time job as emergency coordinator for the
rural, poor county they had moved to, after doing the 20 years and out
thing with the Army. I guess that 20 hour a week job really cut into
his free time.

He subscribes to at least 3 woodworking magazines that I know of.
Additionally, he has shelves full of books of project ideas, plans,
etc. He bought a table saw, mail order, without ever seeing one like
it. There was a radial arm saw on the premises when I started dating
his daughter, I've never seen it used, but I know it works, as there
is a hole in the window directly behind the blade. Been that way as
long as I've been around there. There are cabinets full of
who-knows-what hand tools. Yet I had trouble getting him to find me a
wrench to use while fixing the wash machine for them on my first visit
South, back when I was still trying to make a favorable impression on
them.

Most of the components of a nice wood shop are in place. He has a
cheap version of a shopsmith rolled into the corner. There is a big
cabinet table saw, a generous sized work bench, with a nice wood top
peeking out from the piles. There is a band saw, I've seen it, tucked
under the stairway. One thing that seems to be missing is projects.
There are a few around, but not many. It is also missing signs of
sawdust. These folks are not so tidy that they would run around with
a shop vac after every saw cut. And they don't have a dust collection
system. I have not seen any stacks of wood scraps, either. I seem
to accumulate them rapidly, and I am strictly a part-time, short-time,
seasonal player.

Something else that is missing is any sort of quality in his work. He
is limited by his lack of basic understanding of woodworking tools.

He mentioned to me he was having trouble making a certain cut with his
band saw, he wasn't sure just what was wrong with it. He showed me a
sample, it was apparent he was trying to turn too sharp of an inside
corner, he was trying to turn almost a sharp 90 degrees in a 2 x 4.
When I tried to explain that he needed to come at the inside corner
from 2 directions, I got a real blank look, so I sketched it for him,
once we finally found a pencil in his shop. I think the light bulb
turned almost all the way on! His problem was compounded by the saw
not cutting true, he had not set the table to cut a true 90 degrees to
the blade. That part of my explanation he never did understand I am
sure. Like he hasn't figured out that his particle board table saw
fence isn't much good since it warped. He has no dehumidifier in a
concrete floored out-building, in Georgia. The table is rusted bad,
too. I mentioned it once, all he said was that he really liked his
saw.

He has other problems with power tools. A couple years back, he
remarked that he was looking for a better jointer, the little one he
had didn't work. I asked if he had tried setting the cutter blade
heights? All I could get out of him was that the darn thing was just
cheap, and wouldn't work. On one visit up here, he had taken the
jointer off the stand, disassembled the stand, stuffed the whole thing
in the trunk. I took a good look at, it was a 4 inch model, a
Crapsman, with a separate motor, not too bad looking for what it was,
aside from a layer of rust. I set it aside until this winter, when I
needed to edge some oak, and didn't feel like doing it by hand. Dug
out the jointer, waxed off most of the rust, and dropped a few spots
of oil on the shaft. It ran real quiet, until I put some wood to the
cutters. A little chatter then, not too bad, but I figured it would
be fun to see just how nice a cut I could get from his cast-off tool.
I took the blades out, after a little more rust removal, I honed the
blades, they really weren't bad, no big chunks or nicks on any of the
knives. I put the knives back in, and set their height carefully,
with a magnet on top of a cabinet scraper to hold them. First time
through I was only off a few thousandths on one blade, I reset it, I
remember thinking, hey, not a bad job for my first time ever setting
jointer knives. I fired it up, got a real nice cut, the fence was
even accurate for 90 degree and 45 degree cuts. I have used it
successfully a few times since than. I'm glad to have the tool. Even
a small stationary tool is a luxury for me.

I was really puzzled as to why he thought the jointer was worthless.
I knew he had a few problems using power tools, but this was darn near
a no-brainer. Or was it? Next time in Georgia, I noticed a new
planer parked in the corner. I'm not sure he understood the
difference between a jointer and a planer. Had he been trying to
clean up ¾ inch thick stock on that little jointer? Make it into ½
inch thick stock? I remember him asking me once if I knew where to
buy ½ thick wood. Lots of plans call for ½ thick stock, I've usually
just jiggled a few dimensions to get around my lack of ability when it
comes to re-sawing boards. But I am starting to learn that he can't,
no how, no way, deviate from plans.

So, last Christmas, my Father in-law wanted to make some real wood
toys for his two grandsons. They are 2 years old now, just 3 weeks
apart in age. He did manage to turn out 14 or 15 wooden trucks for
each boy, made to a pattern from some magazine. The varnish was still
tacky on Christmas morning, they had obviously not been sanded, but he
had them packed into two matching Tupperware containers, wrapped and
under the tree. I was 'lucky' to get the inside skinny from him on
what to watch out for when building these toys. Like we needed more
toy trucks around. He complained about the fenders splitting; I had
better be careful of that if I tried to build any. The fenders were
just too thin for the pine (1 x 4) he was using. I was about to ask
why he just didn't cut them bigger, wider, when he mentioned that the
plans gave him all the shapes. I guess we just couldn't try modifying
those plans, now could we?? I shouldn't make fun- I honestly don't
think he knows how to use graph paper, or how to transfer patterns at
different scales, using a grid. I could try to explain it to
him...... nahhh.... more fun to watch him struggle. He was not a
willing student anyway, the couple of times I have tried to explain my
slant on things to him.

I wondered why he had made so many trucks, than it came to me- that
was what the plans called for. Never mind that they were not all
designed at the same scale. I wonder if it ever, at any time,
occurred to him to skip a few of the weirder, more difficult patterns,
maybe trade some quantity for a little higher quality?

I was starting to wonder what had happened to another project I had
caught wind of, I had mentioned something to wife back in October
about cutting a few simple blocks for Boy, but she said, better not,
her dad wanted to make some for the boys. Come Christmas morning,
there were no blocks under tree. Father-in-law made mention of the
fact he had just run out of time, darn it, couldn't manage to get the
blocks done. Blocks? Yes, that's right, no time. Okay, I guess that
could happen.

The blocks showed up in Indiana last weekend, when my in-laws came
from Georgia for their twice yearly visit. There was just one little
problem. They still weren't done. They needed a little finish work,
he said. So I hauled the large cardboard box of rough-cut blocks
'down cellar' as Andy Roonie would say. They did indeed need a little
finish work. Like- the curved pieces needed cut. All needed the
edges rounded over. Nothing was sanded, every piece had saw marks. I
looked a little closer at some blocks he had marked on. It looked
like the grandsons had done some work here. The Southern pine he used
had nice grain patterns, but he hadn't bothered to work around knots.
And there were a lot of blocks. Way more than I would have thought a
two year old could use. Especially when I thought about who would
have to pick them up.

Than something else clicked- these were made to a pattern I had seen
somewhere. Yes, he needed a pattern. For simple blocks. No letters
carved in. No fancy decorations. Just plain old wooden blocks. I
went upstairs, found the book with that pattern. He had cut the exact
number of each shape of blocks called for, no more, no less. I could
see now what he was trying for with the curves he had marked on some
of the blocks. I spent a few minutes measuring some nail cans, paint
cans, jar lids, etc, until I found one with a diameter of 3 inches,
the width of the blocks he had cut. I set my square to an inch and a
half, started re-laying out the curves. He said whoa, there, I traced
that pattern on there special. I said I know, but don't you suppose
the lines were just a little too crooked? Well, he knew that, but how
did I know what to do with those curves. I showed him the plans,
which explained how to mark them. Most folks would instinctively have
known where those curves went, after having seen the pattern, but he
had to see it in print, even after seeing me mark on the actual parts,
even after seeing the patterns in the book.

I started to mark up a few more for the band saw, but he stopped me.
The plans called for 2 of piece A, and 3 each of pieces B and C. I
said, sure but you got, what, 18 or 20 blocks here that are simple
rectangles, and a bunch of plain square ones, aren't the curved ones
cooler? No, that wouldn't work out with the plans. Well, okay. I'm
not gonna loss sleep over it.

So I suggest that maybe he could (use my tools to) help me finish
these blocks? Well, sure, allrighty than, what did I want him to do.
Hell, I want him to go back to Georgia. Okay, better keep a civil
tongue here. Gee, maybe since the router isn't set up yet, and you
don't know where I keep my bits, maybe you are the lucky guy that gets
to cut out the curves. (I may not meet his high standards for
workmanship.) I said, there's the band saw, go for it. Well, maybe
the scroll saw would be better, he says. Less sanding, the blades cut
so much finer. I know how much easier it is to cut gentle arcs on a
band saw, for me anyway, I suggested he think about his choice. But
he wanted to use the scroll saw. Than he informed me that the
hold-down shoe ("this here lever thing" were his exact words) was set
too low. I said, no it is fine. He said, dammit, that hold down is
lower than the stock! He didn't even have the good graces to
apologize when I lifted the spring loaded arm.

As soon as he turned to his task, I mounted up a piloted quarter inch
round-over bit. I started cutting, he turns away from the scroll saw
(it is still running, with the blade still in the work-piece) to check
up.
"The plans called for a chamfer on the blocks"
I turned off the router, took off my ear protection. " 'S'cuse me?"

He said, "The plans called for a chamfer on the blocks. Why don't we
just chamfer them?" I reached over and switched off the scroll saw.

"I don't have a piloted chamfer bit. Would you like me to set up a
fence? YOU can chamfer them if you want!" I would have let him try
to get an even edge using my old fence on a bunch of 3 by 6 inch
blocks. But it was already 8 o'clock at night, and besides, he still
had all his fingers.

"But, the plans......"

"You know, you could have at least taken a pass with a plane on the
long edges of the boards, before you cut the blocks to length." I
have no idea if he has any piloted router bits, I would guess not
though. Otherwise, most any way you could knock a corner off, would
be easier with a long board. "Now you have all these 3 inch edges to
deal with."

That shut him up long enough for me to turn back to the router table,
hit the switch, put my earmuffs back on and start making sawdust. He
finally turned back to the scroll saw. He had refused the ear
protection I offered him. I even offered him the new ear plugs!

There was that hang-up about 'plans' again. Last year when he was up
to visit, he asked me for the plans to some bird feeder poles I had in
the back yard. I had used ¾ inch conduit, borrowed a bender from
work, and whipped up a couple in minutes. If you've ever done any
commercial wiring, as I did for a month or two in the 70's, you would
understand how easy that is. I didn't even have to cut anything to
length- the stock 10 footers worked out about right. I just drilled a
hole in the end, screwed on a little eye bolt to hang the feeder from.
Plan's? Not hardly.

I tried to explain that to him. That it had more to do with the size
of your feeder, and your conduit bending skills. He looked
crestfallen. "No plans?" No, sorry. "Well, how did you know how to
make them?" Look, this feeder is about a foot wide, we want a little
clearance, say 6 inches, so we kick out the last part a foot......
stick a couple feet of vertical length in there, than a gentle bend
back to the centerline where the hook goes..... I'm pointing this all
out while we are standing in front of one. I can see it isn't going
to sink in, so I offer to bend up a couple the next time I visit, if
he'll find a bender we can borrow. That was the last I heard of the
pole thing, but I did see a store bought one in their yard last
Christmas. And a new conduit bender in the corner of his shop.

After he finished the curved cuts in the 8 blocks that required it,
per the plans, he started wandering around the shop. I pointed him to
my new bench-top sander, asked that he put the childproof lockout
switch back on the nail when he is done (which he never once did). So
he started sanding while I went back to routing. The only further
glitch we had was when I was finishing up with much of the routing,
and had to interrupt him to sand the outside corners of some ¾ inch
blocks, I think there were 4 called for in the plans. I explained
that the router bit would be likely to chip out if used on the short
edge, better to sand a radius first, rout the other edges second. I
don't think he understood, but he didn't argue. Right after that we
had to take a break, you ever try to get a 2 year old to sleep when
there are power tools running right under his room?

An hour later, I got up from the living room floor (he plopped his ass
down in my lazy boy every chance he got) and said, well, back to work,
Boy is sound asleep now. I went on down, finished up some routing,
than I put a sanding drum in the drill press. Still no father-in-law,
oh well, I'm better off without that much help. I take a look at the
curves he had cut with the scroll saw- yes, the saw cut was smooth
enough, unfortunately he didn't follow the lines very well, it took me
almost half an hour at the drill press before the parts looked
anything like they were supposed to. I had a couple more passes to
make on the router, still no father in-law, so I figure I'll sand some
more. As the pile of sanded blocks got bigger than the pile not
sanded, I began to get tired. I head up stairs for the night, just in
time to say goodnight, the in-laws are heading off to the 2nd story.
I have other plans for the next day (I always try to make other plans
when we get the visitors from the South), so I explain that the big
pile is rough sanded, the little pile is not. I figure, what he does
from there is not my worry.

The next evening, I get back from kayaking, I carry my wet- dirties to
the basement, and sneak a peek at the blocks. They are lined up like
so many soldiers on my work/saw table. I went back down after dinner
to check the wash machine, and went in to take a closer look at the
blocks. That was when I noticed he hadn't bothered to wipe the saw
dust off the table's wooden top. Hadn't put down any newspaper or
waxed paper either. Which maybe was just as well, because he had
varnished the blocks on all sides. They were basically glued in place
with varnish. I moved them all around a little bit, enough to break
them all lose from the table. The couple of blocks I had bothered
looking at did indeed have saw dust stuck on the bottom. It was also
obvious he had done no further sanding, either rough sanding to the
blocks I had set aside, or finish sanding to any of them. They are
all rough feeling, the varnish had raised the grain.

On the way to the zoo Sunday morning, father-in-law asked me what I
had used to paint some inset panels on a toy box I made for Boy. Was
it anything toxic? I said, I can't imagine what it would matter, he
is not too likely to lick the damn panels, and I'm pretty sure paint
is not toxic to the touch, no matter whether it was oil base or latex
in the first place. But I allowed as how the red panels (I used
different bright colors in removable panels, they can be re-painted if
he thinks it looks childish, someday) were of an oil base. He offered
the suggestion that perhaps I should put a coat of varnish over the
red paint. I could use some of what was left from the can he had
found on my paint shelf. The varnish he used on the blocks. I didn't
say a word. Which you might not believe, if you know me, that I would
sit there and keep my mouth shut. But I did.

Is dried oil based varnish in some way less toxic than an oil based
enamel paint? And is it possible that a block would find its way into
a kids mouth quicker than an inset panel? Awww.. it doesn't matter.
Boy is past chewing on things, anyway. And I doubt either finish
would hurt much, all modern finishes are basically child safe.

It only got weird one more time all day Sunday. He asked me if I had
any rags. I told him where to look. When we got home from the zoo, I
took off on a bike ride, towing my favorite two year old riding
partner in his trailer. That got me out for a couple more hours. By
the time we got back home, I had managed to forget about the blocks.
Took wife to a movie Sunday night, since we had baby sitters handy.
We got home late, woke up early Monday to see them off, while I ran
off to work. Just before I left, he handed me a slip of paper with
some dimensions written on it. He said, "Those blocks are finished,
all they need now is the box to hold them." I said, my project list
is pretty well filled right now, and besides, spring is sprung, I
won't be spending much time in the basement for the next 6 months. He
gives me this look, like, I dunno, I guess he thought if he was going
to make up all these beautiful blocks for my kid, the least I could do
is rush right down there and create a nice box to hold them, right to
the plans, of course.

Monday night, I went down downstairs for final damage assessments.
The blocks were stuffed in the cardboard box they started out in.
There was a rag sitting next to a mostly empty tin of neutral shoe
polish. ( Why did he put shoe polish on them? Is that a military
thing?) A clean paint brush was sitting there, but I couldn't find
any can of mineral spirits around- how much you wanna bet that went
down the drain? He had made a half-hearted attempt to sand something,
because there was a 6 inch disc, folded lengthwise, with a few scrape
marks on it. I guess he couldn't find my sandpaper sheets. I took
the box of blocks upstairs. I will have to scrape varnish globs from
my worktable, but it was getting a little nasty looking anyway. He
had also left a utility knife and scratch awl sitting on the table.
Not a smart move, with a two year old in the house.

Now we have a set of blocks. I had told wife about the sawdust stuck
on them, she looked through the box, kept saying, well, his heart is
in the right place. I said, they're just blocks, fercrissake. She
says, there sure are a lot of them, why do they feel rough? I thought
she was going to cry. I said, you could get rid of a lot of that if
you sand them, than do one more coat of varnish.

But I don't much feel like doing that for some reason, at least not
this week. And they have shoe polish on them, I guess, I am concerned
about the second coat of varnish not sticking to that. Boy didn't
seem too interested in them anyway. I probably should play with him,
with the blocks, one of these days. We'll see.

Mon, Sep 8, 2003, 1:45pm (EDT+4)
(Dan=A0Valleskey) says:
JOAT's post reminded me of something snip

If he spent 20 years in the Army, and is that inefficient, he must
have been an officer.

And, you know, that at least two thirds of the people that reply to
this are going to copy out the whole thing, and not snip a line.

JOAT
Failure is not an option.
But it is definitely a possibility.

Life just ain't life without good music. - JOAT
Web Page Update 8 Sep 2003. Some tunes I like.
http://community-2.webtv.net/Jakofal...OMETUNESILIKE/