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Default New apprentice gets off to a flying start

He filled in his new starter form and where it said "Next of kin" he put
"My Mum".




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"ARW" wrote in message
...
He filled in his new starter form and where it said "Next of kin" he put
"My Mum".


Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

tim



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On 11/01/2019 19:04, ARW wrote:
He filled in his new starter form and where it said "Next of kin" he put
"My Mum".

I blame the person who designed the form if it did not specify eg the
first and last _names_ of the NOK.

Anyhow, could have been worse: eg "my Wensleydale".

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On Friday, 11 January 2019 20:30:54 UTC, Robin wrote:
Anyhow, could have been worse: eg "my Wensleydale".


I didn't recognise that as a dog breed.

Then I googled it and found it wasn't.

Owain

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wrote:

On Friday, 11 January 2019 20:30:54 UTC, Robin wrote:
Anyhow, could have been worse: eg "my Wensleydale".


I didn't recognise that as a dog breed.

Then I googled it and found it wasn't.

Owain


Obviously he is referring to a cheese.

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On Friday, 11 January 2019 19:04:11 UTC, ARW wrote:
He filled in his new starter form and where it said "Next of kin" he put
"My Mum".


At least he didn't write "mummy".

Owain

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On 11/01/2019 19:04, ARW wrote:
He filled in his new starter form and where it said "Next of kin" he put
"My Mum".


Accurate but imprecise.

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Bit of a cheesey reply then.
I hated those forms when you started a job. There was an extremely high
temptation to misinterpret things.

Qualifications always made me laugh as I have no formal ones at all, and
they often simply could not understand why I could do the job better than
their chinless graduate with a million 'ologies' to their name. I tended to
put common sense A in the University of life.
Brian

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wrote in message
...
On Friday, 11 January 2019 20:30:54 UTC, Robin wrote:
Anyhow, could have been worse: eg "my Wensleydale".


I didn't recognise that as a dog breed.

Then I googled it and found it wasn't.

Owain



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On 11/01/2019 21:20, Roger Hayter wrote:
wrote:

On Friday, 11 January 2019 20:30:54 UTC, Robin wrote:
Anyhow, could have been worse: eg "my Wensleydale".


I didn't recognise that as a dog breed.

Then I googled it and found it wasn't.

Owain


Obviously he is referring to a cheese.


Oh no he isn't

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On Saturday, 12 January 2019 07:45:06 UTC, Brian Gaff wrote:
I hated those forms when you started a job. There was an extremely high
temptation to misinterpret things.


I filled in one a couple of years ago. It had one line for phone number. I have five, and that is not including a mobile.

There was also no space for including the mandatory "calls cost 5p + access fee" to comply with Ofcom regulations.

Owain



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On 11/01/2019 19:41, tim... wrote:


"ARW" wrote in message
...
He filled in his new starter form and where it said "Next of kin" he
put "My Mum".


Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

tim



Doctor, to my daughter: "I see you're going to be 3 soon. When's that
going to be?"
Daughter: "On my birfday."

How old is the apprentice?


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On Saturday, 12 January 2019 13:05:52 UTC, GB wrote:
Doctor, to my daughter: "I see you're going to be 3 soon. When's that
going to be?"
Daughter: "On my birfday."


Doctor, to teenage girl: "Big breaths"

Girl: "Yeth, and I'm only fourteen"

Owain

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"GB" wrote in message
...
On 11/01/2019 19:41, tim... wrote:


"ARW" wrote in message
...
He filled in his new starter form and where it said "Next of kin" he put
"My Mum".


Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

tim



Doctor, to my daughter: "I see you're going to be 3 soon. When's that
going to be?"
Daughter: "On my birfday."


Thats a different effect. Kids that young have no
concept of how far into the future things are. They
do understand the concept of in the future or in
the past but have trouble with tomorrow and next
week, let alone in 4 months time for the birthday.

How old is the apprentice?



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On 12/01/2019 13:05, GB wrote:
On 11/01/2019 19:41, tim... wrote:


"ARW" wrote in message
...
He filled in his new starter form and where it said "Next of kin" he
put "My Mum".


Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

tim



Doctor, to my daughter: "I see you're going to be 3 soon. When's that
going to be?"
Daughter: "On my birfday."

How old is the apprentice?


Not old enough to vote but old enough have sex.


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On 12/01/2019 07:44, Brian Gaff wrote:
Bit of a cheesey reply then.
I hated those forms when you started a job. There was an extremely high
temptation to misinterpret things.

Qualifications always made me laugh as I have no formal ones at all, and
they often simply could not understand why I could do the job better than
their chinless graduate with a million 'ologies' to their name. I tended to
put common sense A in the University of life.
Brian


My dad was disappointed that he could not join the IEEE because of lack
of qualifications - he was on a number of (and chairing some) BSI
committees at the time!

SteveW
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In article , Steve Walker
wrote:
On 12/01/2019 07:44, Brian Gaff wrote:
Bit of a cheesey reply then. I hated those forms when you started a
job. There was an extremely high temptation to misinterpret things.

Qualifications always made me laugh as I have no formal ones at all,
and they often simply could not understand why I could do the job
better than their chinless graduate with a million 'ologies' to their
name. I tended to put common sense A in the University of life. Brian


My dad was disappointed that he could not join the IEEE because of lack
of qualifications - he was on a number of (and chairing some) BSI
committees at the time!



why would he want to join an American institution?

--
from KT24 in Surrey, England
"I'd rather die of exhaustion than die of boredom" Thomas Carlyle
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On Sunday, 13 January 2019 02:32:29 UTC, FMurtz wrote:
Girl: "Yeth, and I'm only fourteen"

Thixteen


I think nowadays the age has to be reduced to make the joke funnier.

Thixteen year olds probably have two kids now.

Owain



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On 13/01/2019 09:42, charles wrote:
In article , Steve Walker
wrote:
On 12/01/2019 07:44, Brian Gaff wrote:
Bit of a cheesey reply then. I hated those forms when you started a
job. There was an extremely high temptation to misinterpret things.

Qualifications always made me laugh as I have no formal ones at all,
and they often simply could not understand why I could do the job
better than their chinless graduate with a million 'ologies' to their
name. I tended to put common sense A in the University of life. Brian


My dad was disappointed that he could not join the IEEE because of lack
of qualifications - he was on a number of (and chairing some) BSI
committees at the time!



why would he want to join an American institution?


I was a member of the IEEE once, they have pretty mags and it was free.

I did look at joining the IEE but I felt insulted that they wanted me to
answer two questions on their exam papers when they usually wanted more.

So they were saying I knew more than their usual applicants but not enough.

There wasn't any real advantage of joining anyway.

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In article , dennis@home
wrote:
On 13/01/2019 09:42, charles wrote:
In article , Steve Walker
wrote:
On 12/01/2019 07:44, Brian Gaff wrote:
Bit of a cheesey reply then. I hated those forms when you started a
job. There was an extremely high temptation to misinterpret things.

Qualifications always made me laugh as I have no formal ones at all,
and they often simply could not understand why I could do the job
better than their chinless graduate with a million 'ologies' to
their name. I tended to put common sense A in the University of
life. Brian


My dad was disappointed that he could not join the IEEE because of
lack of qualifications - he was on a number of (and chairing some) BSI
committees at the time!



why would he want to join an American institution?


I was a member of the IEEE once, they have pretty mags and it was free.


I did look at joining the IEE but I felt insulted that they wanted me to
answer two questions on their exam papers when they usually wanted more.


So they were saying I knew more than their usual applicants but not
enough.


Nothing to do with what you knew - just what your existing qualifications
exempted you from/


There wasn't any real advantage of joining anyway.


--
from KT24 in Surrey, England
"I'd rather die of exhaustion than die of boredom" Thomas Carlyle
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On 13/01/2019 11:35, charles wrote:

Nothing to do with what you knew - just what your existing qualifications
exempted you from/


When my father had to leave Germany in 1933, he was a fully qualified
doctor, the equivalent of a consultant in the NHS. The UK medical
profession made him re-qualify before they would allow him to practise.
He just got on with it.



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In article ,
GB wrote:
On 13/01/2019 11:35, charles wrote:


Nothing to do with what you knew - just what your existing
qualifications exempted you from/


When my father had to leave Germany in 1933, he was a fully qualified
doctor, the equivalent of a consultant in the NHS. The UK medical
profession made him re-qualify before they would allow him to practise.
He just got on with it.


whereas Laura K's grandfather finished his medical studies at Rdinburgh.

--
from KT24 in Surrey, England
"I'd rather die of exhaustion than die of boredom" Thomas Carlyle
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GB wrote:
On 13/01/2019 11:35, charles wrote:

Nothing to do with what you knew - just what your existing qualifications
exempted you from/


When my father had to leave Germany in 1933, he was a fully qualified
doctor, the equivalent of a consultant in the NHS. The UK medical
profession made him re-qualify before they would allow him to practise.
He just got on with it.



Similar to a school chums Mother whose qualifications as a midwife gained
in the Netherlands in 1943 were
not accepted as they were issued under the German occupation .
She had to go on a course and get UK ones .


GH


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On 11/01/2019 23:35, Max Demian wrote:
On 11/01/2019 19:04, ARW wrote:
He filled in his new starter form and where it said "Next of kin" he
put "My Mum".


Accurate but imprecise.


And she is probably now too young for me.



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ARW Wrote in message:
On 11/01/2019 23:35, Max Demian wrote:
On 11/01/2019 19:04, ARW wrote:
He filled in his new starter form and where it said "Next of kin" he
put "My Mum".


Accurate but imprecise.


And she is probably now too young for me.




What price experience?...
--
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On Sunday, 13 January 2019 19:44:00 UTC, JimK wrote:
What price experience?...


I thought *in*experience came at a higher price?

Owain



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On Sunday, 13 January 2019 11:11:52 UTC, ARW wrote:
"Mummy mummy can I get pregnant?"
"Of course not Susan you are only seven"



"Okay Mr Khan, I'd like another free kebab please."


Owain
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On Sunday, 13 January 2019 11:05:28 UTC, dennis@home wrote:
On 13/01/2019 09:42, charles wrote:
In article , Steve Walker
wrote:
On 12/01/2019 07:44, Brian Gaff wrote:
Bit of a cheesey reply then. I hated those forms when you started a
job. There was an extremely high temptation to misinterpret things.

Qualifications always made me laugh as I have no formal ones at all,
and they often simply could not understand why I could do the job
better than their chinless graduate with a million 'ologies' to their
name. I tended to put common sense A in the University of life. Brian


My dad was disappointed that he could not join the IEEE because of lack
of qualifications - he was on a number of (and chairing some) BSI
committees at the time!



why would he want to join an American institution?


I was a member of the IEEE once, they have pretty mags and it was free.

I did look at joining the IEE but I felt insulted that they wanted me to
answer two questions on their exam papers when they usually wanted more.

So they were saying I knew more than their usual applicants but not enough.

There wasn't any real advantage of joining anyway.


it's the IET now it change in 2006.
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In article ,
whisky-dave wrote:
On Sunday, 13 January 2019 11:05:28 UTC, dennis@home wrote:
On 13/01/2019 09:42, charles wrote:
In article , Steve Walker
wrote:
On 12/01/2019 07:44, Brian Gaff wrote:
Bit of a cheesey reply then. I hated those forms when you started a
job. There was an extremely high temptation to misinterpret things.

Qualifications always made me laugh as I have no formal ones at
all, and they often simply could not understand why I could do the
job better than their chinless graduate with a million 'ologies'
to their name. I tended to put common sense A in the University
of life. Brian

My dad was disappointed that he could not join the IEEE because of
lack of qualifications - he was on a number of (and chairing some)
BSI committees at the time!


why would he want to join an American institution?


I was a member of the IEEE once, they have pretty mags and it was free.

I did look at joining the IEE but I felt insulted that they wanted me
to answer two questions on their exam papers when they usually wanted
more.

So they were saying I knew more than their usual applicants but not
enough.

There wasn't any real advantage of joining anyway.


it's the IET now it change in 2006.


Yes, you now only have to be interested in Electricity to join,

--
from KT24 in Surrey, England
"I'd rather die of exhaustion than die of boredom" Thomas Carlyle


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On Mon, 14 Jan 2019 06:16:29 -0800, whisky-dave wrote:

On Sunday, 13 January 2019 11:05:28 UTC, dennis@home wrote:
On 13/01/2019 09:42, charles wrote:
In article , Steve Walker
wrote:
On 12/01/2019 07:44, Brian Gaff wrote:
Bit of a cheesey reply then. I hated those forms when you started a
job. There was an extremely high temptation to misinterpret things.

Qualifications always made me laugh as I have no formal ones at
all, and they often simply could not understand why I could do the
job better than their chinless graduate with a million 'ologies'
to their name. I tended to put common sense A in the University
of life. Brian

My dad was disappointed that he could not join the IEEE because of
lack of qualifications - he was on a number of (and chairing some)
BSI committees at the time!


why would he want to join an American institution?


I was a member of the IEEE once, they have pretty mags and it was free.

I did look at joining the IEE but I felt insulted that they wanted me
to answer two questions on their exam papers when they usually wanted
more.

So they were saying I knew more than their usual applicants but not
enough.

There wasn't any real advantage of joining anyway.


it's the IET now it change in 2006.


I joined with minimal fuss many years ago. At least I get the occasional
interesting meeting, the magazine is very good, and free coffee if I'm
around the Embankment!

Strangely, my CEng isn't with them, but with the BCS (they have good
coffee too).
--
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On Mon, 14 Jan 2019 14:43:01 +0000, charles wrote:

In article ,
whisky-dave wrote:
On Sunday, 13 January 2019 11:05:28 UTC, dennis@home wrote:
On 13/01/2019 09:42, charles wrote:
In article , Steve Walker
wrote:
On 12/01/2019 07:44, Brian Gaff wrote:
Bit of a cheesey reply then. I hated those forms when you started
a job. There was an extremely high temptation to misinterpret
things.

Qualifications always made me laugh as I have no formal ones at
all, and they often simply could not understand why I could do
the job better than their chinless graduate with a million
'ologies' to their name. I tended to put common sense A in the
University of life. Brian

My dad was disappointed that he could not join the IEEE because of
lack of qualifications - he was on a number of (and chairing some)
BSI committees at the time!


why would he want to join an American institution?


I was a member of the IEEE once, they have pretty mags and it was
free.

I did look at joining the IEE but I felt insulted that they wanted me
to answer two questions on their exam papers when they usually wanted
more.

So they were saying I knew more than their usual applicants but not
enough.

There wasn't any real advantage of joining anyway.


it's the IET now it change in 2006.


Yes, you now only have to be interested in Electricity to join,


Eh? Do you know what IET stands for?



--
My posts are my copyright and if @diy_forums or Home Owners' Hub
wish to copy them they can pay me £1 a message.
Use the BIG mirror service in the UK: http://www.mirrorservice.org
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On 14/01/2019 14:50, Bob Eager wrote:
On Mon, 14 Jan 2019 14:43:01 +0000, charles wrote:

In article ,
whisky-dave wrote:
On Sunday, 13 January 2019 11:05:28 UTC, dennis@home wrote:
On 13/01/2019 09:42, charles wrote:
In article , Steve Walker
wrote:
On 12/01/2019 07:44, Brian Gaff wrote:
Bit of a cheesey reply then. I hated those forms when you started
a job. There was an extremely high temptation to misinterpret
things.

Qualifications always made me laugh as I have no formal ones at
all, and they often simply could not understand why I could do
the job better than their chinless graduate with a million
'ologies' to their name. I tended to put common sense A in the
University of life. Brian

My dad was disappointed that he could not join the IEEE because of
lack of qualifications - he was on a number of (and chairing some)
BSI committees at the time!


why would he want to join an American institution?


I was a member of the IEEE once, they have pretty mags and it was
free.

I did look at joining the IEE but I felt insulted that they wanted me
to answer two questions on their exam papers when they usually wanted
more.

So they were saying I knew more than their usual applicants but not
enough.

There wasn't any real advantage of joining anyway.


it's the IET now it change in 2006.


Yes, you now only have to be interested in Electricity to join,


Eh? Do you know what IET stands for?




There's "associate" that doesn't need any qualifications - albeit
doesn't give any letters to go with the BH Calcutta (failed)

https://www.theiet.org/membership/ty...ters/index.cfm

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In article ,
Bob Eager wrote:
On Mon, 14 Jan 2019 14:43:01 +0000, charles wrote:


In article ,
whisky-dave wrote:
On Sunday, 13 January 2019 11:05:28 UTC, dennis@home wrote:
On 13/01/2019 09:42, charles wrote:
In article , Steve Walker
wrote:
On 12/01/2019 07:44, Brian Gaff wrote:
Bit of a cheesey reply then. I hated those forms when you started
a job. There was an extremely high temptation to misinterpret
things.

Qualifications always made me laugh as I have no formal ones at
all, and they often simply could not understand why I could do
the job better than their chinless graduate with a million
'ologies' to their name. I tended to put common sense A in the
University of life. Brian

My dad was disappointed that he could not join the IEEE because of
lack of qualifications - he was on a number of (and chairing some)
BSI committees at the time!


why would he want to join an American institution?


I was a member of the IEEE once, they have pretty mags and it was
free.

I did look at joining the IEE but I felt insulted that they wanted me
to answer two questions on their exam papers when they usually wanted
more.

So they were saying I knew more than their usual applicants but not
enough.

There wasn't any real advantage of joining anyway.


it's the IET now it change in 2006.


Yes, you now only have to be interested in Electricity to join,


Eh? Do you know what IET stands for?


yes, I'm a Member - and I got my 50 year badge some years ago.

--
from KT24 in Surrey, England
"I'd rather die of exhaustion than die of boredom" Thomas Carlyle
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On Monday, 14 January 2019 14:45:44 UTC, charles wrote:
In article ,
whisky-dave wrote:
On Sunday, 13 January 2019 11:05:28 UTC, dennis@home wrote:
On 13/01/2019 09:42, charles wrote:
In article , Steve Walker
wrote:
On 12/01/2019 07:44, Brian Gaff wrote:
Bit of a cheesey reply then. I hated those forms when you started a
job. There was an extremely high temptation to misinterpret things.

Qualifications always made me laugh as I have no formal ones at
all, and they often simply could not understand why I could do the
job better than their chinless graduate with a million 'ologies'
to their name. I tended to put common sense A in the University
of life. Brian

My dad was disappointed that he could not join the IEEE because of
lack of qualifications - he was on a number of (and chairing some)
BSI committees at the time!


why would he want to join an American institution?


I was a member of the IEEE once, they have pretty mags and it was free.

I did look at joining the IEE but I felt insulted that they wanted me
to answer two questions on their exam papers when they usually wanted
more.

So they were saying I knew more than their usual applicants but not
enough.

There wasn't any real advantage of joining anyway.


it's the IET now it change in 2006.


Yes, you now only have to be interested in Electricity to join,


We get free badges and other free stuff to hand out to the students.
There's various ways of becoming some sort of memeber I was asked and then they put me off by mentioning a membership fee.



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