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Stormin Mormon
 
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Default Change a light bulb Usenet Style

found this in a different group but I though it was appropriate, just
change light bulb to lock.
How many group posters does it take to
change a light bulb?

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been
changed

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the
light bulb could have been changed differently

2 to call for an exact make and model of the light bulb, including model
number and serial numbers and wattages before they give any further
information.

7 to insist that they are professional light bulb changers. They will
caution about the dangers of ignorant home owners changing light bulbs

2 (a different two, by the way) to say "blow me" as their only contribution.

3 to reccomend that the home owner call a professional electrician, which
will be much more effective in the long run, instead of just throwing parts
at it.

4 to call the 7 professional light bulb changers racists and bigots for
trying to talk down to poor, disadvantaged home owners.

27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light
bulbs

37 to flame the first three who replied because they top posted.

42 to reply (on top of the post) that top posting is just fine

53 to flame the spell checkers

6 posters to insist that the wiring is far too small, and that the H.O. is
at risk of fire.

1 to insist that the correct way to remove a light bulb is with a 20 ounce
waffle face framing hammer

41 to correct spelling/grammar flames

29 to ask the flamers to at least trim the excess text before posting

52 flamers to send all headers, footers, and chicken scratches back with
rude remarks about people who want to tell them what to do.

2 to send all headers, footers, and such back with the comment "BLOW ME".

6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" or "Lite-Bulb"

6 to condemn those 6 as anal-retentive

2 (same two) to say "BLOW ME" again

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is
"lamp"

15 know-it-alls who claim *they* were in the industry, and that "light
bulb" is perfectly correct

156 to email the participant's ISPs complaining that they are in
violation of their "acceptable use policy"

109 to post that this group is not about light bulbs and to please take
this discussion to a lightbulb group

203 to demand that cross posting to hardware forum, off-topic forum, and
lightbulb group about changing light bulbs be stopped

111 to defend the posting to this group saying that we all use light
bulbs and therefore the posts *are* relevant to this group

306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to
buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for
this technique and what brands are faulty

27 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs

14 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the
corrected URL's

3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to
this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group

33 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all
headers, chicken scratches, and signatures, and add "Me too"

12 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they
cannot handle the light bulb controversy

19 to quote the "Me too's" to say "Me three"

4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ

44 to ask what is a "FAQ"

4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"

143 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions
about light bulbs"

1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and
start it all over again


--

Christopher A. Young
Learn more about Jesus
www.lds.org
www.mormons.com



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Bob
 
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Default Change a light bulb Usenet Style Now, that is FUNNY)


"Stormin Mormon" wrote


That was reasonably accurate, and down right funny.

Thanks for posting.

B-t


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