Al,

As others have said, you really need to do a lot of homework
on your own. Start by typing the following into Google:
building cost estimator

You will discover 27,000,000 hits on those search terms, and
the first one appears to be very adequate for a reasonable
ballpark estimate:
www.building-cost.net

Obviously, the estimator is making assumptions which may
not apply in your case, such as site accessibility, site grade,
etc.

Satisfy our curiosity a bit: What are your plans for solar power?
Generating electricity? Enough electricity for conventional AC?
Enough for heating with a heat pump? Or are you planning direct
solar heating without the intermediate step of creating electricity?

What are your anticipated power needs? Heating requirements
based upon the location and your life style; Cooling requirements;
Electrical requirements.

You don't seem to know much about construction. Do you know
much about the front end costs of solar systems? And the eventual
maintenance costs such as battery bank replacement? The installation
of solar systems, especially electrical generation, is very expensive.

Don't forget to include the likely cost of super insulating the home
because of your solar requirements.

Have you considered and investigated other energy sources? With
LP gas trucked in to on-site storage tanks, you can obviously heat
your home, you can generate electricity with a generator set up for
LP gas, and you can cool your home with a gas AC unit. Fuel oil
can also be stored in tanks and used for all 3 energy requirements.
If you wish to augment this with solar, then I'd guess that solar
water heating and solar home heating are the two most cost effective
choices.

Describe your site. How accessible for construction and how accessible
for fuel delivery? Can you legally install a well or a septic system on
the site. I have a friend who owns 2 empty lots in a very desireable
and established area. The lots are worth a small fortune except for
the fact that neither wells nor septic systems can be installed on the
lots. (Existing homes are grandfathered under older zoning laws).

By the way, the one particular cost estimating website that I mentioned
above will itemize material costs, labor costs, and equipment costs.
Still, based upon your questions, I'm not too certain that you sound
like a person suited for performing as a general contractor and primary
laborer. This is a lot more work than you think and is going to involve
a lot more homework than this simple cost estimating which seems to
have you overwhelmed. Just being realistic.

Good luck,
Gideon